It seems like only two months ago that Pamela Anderson was aglow with happiness over her quickie Las Vegas wedding to Rick Salomon. Actually, it was!
But the 40-year-old ex-"Baywatch" beauty has filed for divorce from her 38-year-old husband after just two months of marriage.
Anderson cited irreconcilable differences in papers filed Friday in Los Angeles County Superior Court. The documents were first obtained by the celebrity Web site CelebTV.com.
Anderson and Salomon wed Oct. 6 during a break between the 7 p.m. and 10 p.m. shows of "Hans Klok's The Beauty of Magic" at Planet Hollywood resort, where Anderson was starring as a magician's assistant. The couple separated less than 10 weeks later, on Dec. 13.
Salomon is best known for making a sex videotape with Paris Hilton, his girlfriend at the time, and was previously married to actress Shannen Doherty. Anderson was previously married to singer Kid Rock and Motley Crue drummer Tommy Lee.
Now it turns out that Pamela Anderson and Rick Salomon have reconciled and they are not getting divorced, TMZ.com reported Monday.
A source close to the couple told TMZ they had a huge fight, but have now made up.
On her Web site Monday, Pam hinted that she and Rick were "working things out."
But on Friday, the former "Baywatch" babe filed a claim for dissolution of her marriage to Salomon, the co-star of the Paris Hilton sex tape, only two months after they wed, according to court documents first obtained by CelebTV.com. She cited irreconcilable differences as the cause.
Anderson and Salomon recently shot down rumors they would star in their own TV reality show.
On Thursday, the actress wrote on her blog: "I WAS considering...Only to promote and have people see what it's like to create a show and be on stage starring in a big Vegas production. (probably not happening anymore) not my family life. (Never my kids) I have to make a lot of big decisions. The choices I have to make now are about quality of life. And meaning. Not about money or fame for no good reason. I know I've made a lot of mistakes. But no regrets -- Just living such a huge dream....I'm blessed. So many options. I can't complain. I can be confused."
Anderson and Salomon wed Oct. 6 during a break between the 7 p.m. and 10 p.m. shows of "Hans Klok's The Beauty of Magic" at Planet Hollywood resort, where Anderson was starring as a magician's assistant.
Anderson, 40, has been previously married to singer Kid Rock and Motley Crue drummer Tommy Lee.
Salomon, 38, is best-known for making a sex videotape with his then-girlfriend Paris Hilton and was previously married to actress Shannen Doherty.
Monday, December 17, 2007
Monday, December 10, 2007
Give The Gift They REALLY Want!
This Holiday, get it right! Give them what they want MOST! A gift of porn says "I Love You" in a way like no other, so click here and shop online now for the gift they will really love! You will be glad you did!
Months in Jail for Role in Dogfighting Conspiracy
RICHMOND, Va. — Michael Vick was sentenced to 23 months in prison Monday for his role in a dogfighting conspiracy that involved gambling and killing pit bulls that did not perform up to expectations.
U.S. District Judge Henry E. Hudson could have sentenced the suspended Atlanta Falcons quarterback to up to five years. Vick pleaded guilty in August, admitting that he bankrolled the "Bad Newz Kennels" dogfighting operation and that he helped kill six to eight dogs.
Vick was dressed in black-and-white striped prison suit and apologized to the court and his family.
Vick pleaded guilty in August. In a plea agreement, he admitted bankrolling the "Bad Newz Kennels" dogfighting operation on his 15-acre property in rural southeastern Virginia and helping kill six to eight pit bulls that did not perform well in test fights.
He also admitted providing money for bets on the fights but said he never shared in any winnings.
U.S. District Judge Henry E. Hudson could have sentenced the suspended Atlanta Falcons quarterback to up to five years. Vick pleaded guilty in August, admitting that he bankrolled the "Bad Newz Kennels" dogfighting operation and that he helped kill six to eight dogs.
Vick was dressed in black-and-white striped prison suit and apologized to the court and his family.
Vick pleaded guilty in August. In a plea agreement, he admitted bankrolling the "Bad Newz Kennels" dogfighting operation on his 15-acre property in rural southeastern Virginia and helping kill six to eight pit bulls that did not perform well in test fights.
He also admitted providing money for bets on the fights but said he never shared in any winnings.
Thursday, November 22, 2007
Wednesday, November 21, 2007
Kim Kardashian Sure Knows How To Make A Whole Lot Out Of Nothing.
This article is from AOL, on the Black Voices Blog. How hard do you think Ray to tha J slammed this girl in the Vivid best selling classic? LOL!
The alleged Hollywood socialite is gracing the cover of Playboy magazine's December issue, which hit newsstands this week.
On the outside of the magazine, the Armenian beauty and tabloid mainstay is adorned in a red, stringy satin get-up accentuated by red high heels – perfect tie-in for the holiday season. Inside, she strikes a myriad of poses, which exposes her full and abundant endowments.
"It is not as revealing as some people might want," she said in a recent interview. "I keep it classy ... It was something that I was really nervous about doing at first. "Kardashian is the daughter of late OJ Simpson attorney Robert Kardashian, and the ex-wife of music producer Damon Thomas of The Underdogs. Since gaining popularity as a "best-friend" of over-exposed hotel heiress Paris Hilton, the voluptuous pin-up girl, professionally known as a fashion stylist for R&B stars, has been romantically linked to a slew of sought after black celebrity bachelors, including football star Reggie Bush and actor Nick Cannon.
The commercial release of 'Kim K Superstar' -- her raunchy sex tape with hip-hop soul crooner Ray-J -- earlier this year, propelled her into the stratosphere of quasi-celebrity scandal.
She sued adult video giant Vivid Entertainment and halted the sale of the best-selling DVD.
On Oct. 14, E! Entertainment Television debuted 'Keepin Up with the Kardashians,' a far-fetched reality series following on the day-to-day dilemmas of the sexpot's family dynamic. Surprisingly, the story-line – which revolves around her over-the-top "momager" Kris Jenner and mild-mannered, conservative stepdad Bruce Jenner trying to keep up with their young son Robert and five outrageous daughters – ranked as the number one show among women (ages 18 to 34) in its Sunday night premiere timeslot.
After four weeks on the air, the series has reached more than 13 million total viewers, a network rep confirmed.
Today, E! announced the second season pick-up for the hit half-hour reality series, which is produced by 'American Idol' host Ryan Seacrest. "Viewers have clearly fallen for the Kardashians," network Executive Vice President Lisa Berger said in a statement. "This family's one-of-a-kind dynamics and hilarious antics has made the series a fantastic addition to our prime time line-up."
The alleged Hollywood socialite is gracing the cover of Playboy magazine's December issue, which hit newsstands this week.
On the outside of the magazine, the Armenian beauty and tabloid mainstay is adorned in a red, stringy satin get-up accentuated by red high heels – perfect tie-in for the holiday season. Inside, she strikes a myriad of poses, which exposes her full and abundant endowments.
"It is not as revealing as some people might want," she said in a recent interview. "I keep it classy ... It was something that I was really nervous about doing at first. "Kardashian is the daughter of late OJ Simpson attorney Robert Kardashian, and the ex-wife of music producer Damon Thomas of The Underdogs. Since gaining popularity as a "best-friend" of over-exposed hotel heiress Paris Hilton, the voluptuous pin-up girl, professionally known as a fashion stylist for R&B stars, has been romantically linked to a slew of sought after black celebrity bachelors, including football star Reggie Bush and actor Nick Cannon.
The commercial release of 'Kim K Superstar' -- her raunchy sex tape with hip-hop soul crooner Ray-J -- earlier this year, propelled her into the stratosphere of quasi-celebrity scandal.
She sued adult video giant Vivid Entertainment and halted the sale of the best-selling DVD.
On Oct. 14, E! Entertainment Television debuted 'Keepin Up with the Kardashians,' a far-fetched reality series following on the day-to-day dilemmas of the sexpot's family dynamic. Surprisingly, the story-line – which revolves around her over-the-top "momager" Kris Jenner and mild-mannered, conservative stepdad Bruce Jenner trying to keep up with their young son Robert and five outrageous daughters – ranked as the number one show among women (ages 18 to 34) in its Sunday night premiere timeslot.
After four weeks on the air, the series has reached more than 13 million total viewers, a network rep confirmed.
Today, E! announced the second season pick-up for the hit half-hour reality series, which is produced by 'American Idol' host Ryan Seacrest. "Viewers have clearly fallen for the Kardashians," network Executive Vice President Lisa Berger said in a statement. "This family's one-of-a-kind dynamics and hilarious antics has made the series a fantastic addition to our prime time line-up."
Friday, November 09, 2007
Lexington Steele Talks About the Mainstreaming of Adult
Lexington Steele, owner of Mercenary Pictures and three-time AVN Male Performer of the Year, weighed in on his opinions of the adult industry on TV One's late night talk show, Baisden After Dark.
Hosted by national radio personality Michael Baisden, Steele's appearance on Baisden After Dark centered on the growing acceptance of the adult industry in popular culture. Fellow performer Nikki Fairchild and Senior Pastor of the first African Village Church Ray Hagins also were on hand during the show.
"The show's approach to talking about the adult industry was refreshing,"
Steele, who also appeared on Baisden's nationally syndicated radio show,
said.
"Michael didn't ambush us with anti-porn guests or paint the industry
as unsavory or being full of social misfits - in fact, the pastor he had on
stage with us, Ray Hagins, was very supportive of the role X-rated videos
could play in relationships. Michael concentrated on why it was becoming a
more acceptable part of society and did not judge the industry or the people who are part of it."
The appearance on Baisden After Dark follows a string of mainstream
appearances for Steele, including a role in two episodes of Showtime's Weeds and the use of Topco's Lexcalibur, a dildo molded after Steele, in HBO's Entourage, as well as the completion of his own pilots for a reality and talk show. Steele will also appear in an upcoming episode of FX's Nip/Tuck.
Hosted by national radio personality Michael Baisden, Steele's appearance on Baisden After Dark centered on the growing acceptance of the adult industry in popular culture. Fellow performer Nikki Fairchild and Senior Pastor of the first African Village Church Ray Hagins also were on hand during the show.
"The show's approach to talking about the adult industry was refreshing,"
Steele, who also appeared on Baisden's nationally syndicated radio show,
said.
"Michael didn't ambush us with anti-porn guests or paint the industry
as unsavory or being full of social misfits - in fact, the pastor he had on
stage with us, Ray Hagins, was very supportive of the role X-rated videos
could play in relationships. Michael concentrated on why it was becoming a
more acceptable part of society and did not judge the industry or the people who are part of it."
The appearance on Baisden After Dark follows a string of mainstream
appearances for Steele, including a role in two episodes of Showtime's Weeds and the use of Topco's Lexcalibur, a dildo molded after Steele, in HBO's Entourage, as well as the completion of his own pilots for a reality and talk show. Steele will also appear in an upcoming episode of FX's Nip/Tuck.
NY Post: "Defiant Porn Poobah to Sell Amy Fisher Vid"; Copyright Infringement Case Coming?
Porn Valley - A Los Angeles porn peddler yesterday said he's going forward with plans to sell an Amy Fisher sex tape, despite her threats to take him to court.
David Joseph, CEO of Red Light District, said he's on firm legal footing and will sell "Amy Fisher Caught on Tape" on Nov. 14, for $40 a pop.
Fisher's husband, Lou Bellera, sold footage of the couple's sex romps to Red Light this summer when he and the Long Island Lolita were briefly estranged.
"I made this deal with Lou Bellera, and I'm very confident we have everything legally done," Joseph told The Post.
But Fisher's lawyer, William DalesSandro, said that his client never signed off on Bellera hawking the tape and that she has an airtight case of copyright infringement.
Joseph credited Bellera, a professional videographer, with producing good footage.
"I've watched it several times. The lighting is good, the sex is good, Amy looks good," Joseph said.
David Joseph, CEO of Red Light District, said he's on firm legal footing and will sell "Amy Fisher Caught on Tape" on Nov. 14, for $40 a pop.
Fisher's husband, Lou Bellera, sold footage of the couple's sex romps to Red Light this summer when he and the Long Island Lolita were briefly estranged.
"I made this deal with Lou Bellera, and I'm very confident we have everything legally done," Joseph told The Post.
But Fisher's lawyer, William DalesSandro, said that his client never signed off on Bellera hawking the tape and that she has an airtight case of copyright infringement.
Joseph credited Bellera, a professional videographer, with producing good footage.
"I've watched it several times. The lighting is good, the sex is good, Amy looks good," Joseph said.
Thursday, November 01, 2007
Monday, October 29, 2007
Preview The New Movie - The Education of Charlie Banks Trailer
Preview The New Movie - The Education of Charlie Banks Trailer - Portland, ME Showing
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K-Fed's New G-Friend On B-Spears
The quotes are from Nicole Narain, K-Fed's new girlfriend. She tells us what Kevin Federline says about different aspects of the marriage and divorce. Read: The Ex Is A Mess...
On Britney’s mental state:
"Britney's behaviour has already put our kids at risk and I can't let things get any worse. She's lost all grasp on reality and is dragging the children through hell. Her mood swings are now so wild that I live in fear of getting a call telling me that she has killed herself. I can't allow her to have custody because I seriously believe she could harm our sons. I've shared her life and I know she's capable of anything with pills and a few drinks inside her."
On Britney’s drinking:
"I'd see her walking around the house guzzling vodka and Coke and looking very tipsy. Then a few moments later, I saw her pick up Jayden and start breast-feeding him. That sent me up the wall. I yelled at her, ‘If you really wanna drink then make sure the baby gets bottled milk, not yours.' I was terrified she was poisoning my son. But she wouldn't listen. She never would. She treated me like one of her employees who bowed to her every whim. "She screamed back, ‘You can't talk to me that way!' But I had to stand up for my children as well as myself.
On what led to the divorce:
"Two weeks later she filed for divorce. I only found out when I heard it as a news item on the radio. I felt she was just trying to teach me a lesson for telling her off about the breast-feeding incident. But when I called she kicked off another row and screamed, ‘You're nothing without me'. I never wanted a divorce but now I knew there was no option."
On Britney’s parenting:
“During the last few months I'd started picking her up on her parenting skills. She'd leave the kids near the pool unsupervised or drive around without belting them in. She always insisted what she was doing was right. There was no getting through to her.”
On Britney's bi-curious pass at Nicole:
“I was doing my make-up and I could feel someone staring at me. It was Britney, in a green dress and looking a bit spaced-out. She looked at me in a provocative way... I thought she was hoping to get me closer to her. When I told Kevin he nodded and said, ‘Knowing her, she probably was'.”
Nicole says:
"Kevin is battling for his kids as he genuinely fears they are at risk. He never shouts and screams about Britney in front of me. He does speak openly about his concerns for his children though." According to Nicole, Kevin is especially worried about the damage Britney's lifestyle is doing to their sons.
She reveals: "I was with Kevin on Monday morning when his kids turned up after spending time with Britney. He was overjoyed to see them, but deeply concerned about what they'd been through.
"On Monday he was treating Jayden for pink eye (conjunctivitis), and was worried Britney was to blame. He told me if they had joint custody he'd need two days just to get the children settled down and calm again after their stint away with Britney. He says she keeps them up and has no fixed routine which makes them over-stressed, over-tired and desperate for attention.
"He has tried to get Britney to change her ways, but gets nowhere. He gets so upset when the kids are with her that he won't switch on the TV as he knows there will be news footage of her with them in LA.
"He can't bear to see them looking stressed, traumatized and disorientated as she carts them off on another jaunt around town, seemingly for no reason. That's one of the key reasons why he went for custody in court."
The custody battle began in Los Angeles in September, the month Kevin met Nicole. He landed the first blow when his lawyers presented the LA Superior Court with a dossier about Britney's antics, including alleged lesbian flings, drug abuse, drinking and bad parenting.
We can reveal Kevin included the lesbian allegations after Nicole told him about her flirty encounter with Britney last December. Nicole, who met Kevin at a fashion party at Hollywood club Vice, said: "I told him Britney had once tried to kiss me. We met in the toilets of Beverly Hills restaurant Mr Chows.
"I was doing my make-up and I could feel someone staring at me. It was Britney, in a green dress and looking a bit spaced-out. She looked at me in a provocative way. I found it unnerving, but I smiled to be friendly.
"She then cosied alongside me by the mirror and asked to borrow my lip-gloss. I agreed, put some on my finger and let her rub it on. She rolled her eyes and giggled before suggestively rubbing it over her lips. It became clear she was flirting.
"She then asked for some more and kind of leaned into me and glared intensely. I thought she was hoping to get me closer to her. When I told Kevin he nodded and said, ‘Knowing her, she probably was'. I was shocked that she'd try to pick up someone in a toilet. I presume she's bisexual. I threw away the lip-gloss after that, thinking how tacky her behaviour was." Nicole revealed doting dad Kevin has created a real family home for his children.
She said: "Kevin has made a point of surrounding himself with genuine and pleasant people. Unlike Britney's place, his seven-bedroom mansion is a real home for him and his children.
"He has a housekeeper, cleaner and string of staff in all the time. The nanny comes in when needed and it makes for a real family environment. When you walk in you go into a hallway and there are pictures of him with his kids everywhere. There are the kids' toys stacked up including Sean's plastic truck which he rides around in the house. Jayden has his little cuddly toys in boxes as well. In the backyard the kids have a huge jungle gym activity kit, which they play with."
Nicole revealed Kevin has bedrooms not only for Sean and Jayden but also for his kids by former partner Shar Jackson—Kori, five, and three-year-old Kaleb.
She said: "Each of the lads has a bed in the shape of a Ferrari. The walls are painted with animals and shapes and are full up with toys. Sean's room has a big toy train set around the outside. Jayden still has trouble sleeping, so Kevin has put an extra Ferrari bed in his own bedroom."
Nicole slammed claims that Kevin is a wild-partying gold-digger.
The former Playboy Playmate said: "He may have been a party animal in the past, but I haven't seen him talk about or take drugs. He does like a bourbon and Coke, but he'll have a couple of those and call it a night. He has his home and that's where he spends most of his time now."
This weekend, Britney and Kevin were each spending one day with their children.
On Friday, after a three-hour hearing attended by the couple, Superior Court Commissioner Scott Gordon postponed a decision on Britney's application to win back custody of the boys. At one point a clearly disturbed Britney ran out of the court yelling: "Eat it, lick it, snort it, f*** it."
Nicole said: "I feel sorry for Britney. She has lost the love of a very caring, passionate and intelligent man. At the moment his priority is fighting for his children."
On Britney’s mental state:
"Britney's behaviour has already put our kids at risk and I can't let things get any worse. She's lost all grasp on reality and is dragging the children through hell. Her mood swings are now so wild that I live in fear of getting a call telling me that she has killed herself. I can't allow her to have custody because I seriously believe she could harm our sons. I've shared her life and I know she's capable of anything with pills and a few drinks inside her."
On Britney’s drinking:
"I'd see her walking around the house guzzling vodka and Coke and looking very tipsy. Then a few moments later, I saw her pick up Jayden and start breast-feeding him. That sent me up the wall. I yelled at her, ‘If you really wanna drink then make sure the baby gets bottled milk, not yours.' I was terrified she was poisoning my son. But she wouldn't listen. She never would. She treated me like one of her employees who bowed to her every whim. "She screamed back, ‘You can't talk to me that way!' But I had to stand up for my children as well as myself.
On what led to the divorce:
"Two weeks later she filed for divorce. I only found out when I heard it as a news item on the radio. I felt she was just trying to teach me a lesson for telling her off about the breast-feeding incident. But when I called she kicked off another row and screamed, ‘You're nothing without me'. I never wanted a divorce but now I knew there was no option."
On Britney’s parenting:
“During the last few months I'd started picking her up on her parenting skills. She'd leave the kids near the pool unsupervised or drive around without belting them in. She always insisted what she was doing was right. There was no getting through to her.”
On Britney's bi-curious pass at Nicole:
“I was doing my make-up and I could feel someone staring at me. It was Britney, in a green dress and looking a bit spaced-out. She looked at me in a provocative way... I thought she was hoping to get me closer to her. When I told Kevin he nodded and said, ‘Knowing her, she probably was'.”
Nicole says:
"Kevin is battling for his kids as he genuinely fears they are at risk. He never shouts and screams about Britney in front of me. He does speak openly about his concerns for his children though." According to Nicole, Kevin is especially worried about the damage Britney's lifestyle is doing to their sons.
She reveals: "I was with Kevin on Monday morning when his kids turned up after spending time with Britney. He was overjoyed to see them, but deeply concerned about what they'd been through.
"On Monday he was treating Jayden for pink eye (conjunctivitis), and was worried Britney was to blame. He told me if they had joint custody he'd need two days just to get the children settled down and calm again after their stint away with Britney. He says she keeps them up and has no fixed routine which makes them over-stressed, over-tired and desperate for attention.
"He has tried to get Britney to change her ways, but gets nowhere. He gets so upset when the kids are with her that he won't switch on the TV as he knows there will be news footage of her with them in LA.
"He can't bear to see them looking stressed, traumatized and disorientated as she carts them off on another jaunt around town, seemingly for no reason. That's one of the key reasons why he went for custody in court."
The custody battle began in Los Angeles in September, the month Kevin met Nicole. He landed the first blow when his lawyers presented the LA Superior Court with a dossier about Britney's antics, including alleged lesbian flings, drug abuse, drinking and bad parenting.
We can reveal Kevin included the lesbian allegations after Nicole told him about her flirty encounter with Britney last December. Nicole, who met Kevin at a fashion party at Hollywood club Vice, said: "I told him Britney had once tried to kiss me. We met in the toilets of Beverly Hills restaurant Mr Chows.
"I was doing my make-up and I could feel someone staring at me. It was Britney, in a green dress and looking a bit spaced-out. She looked at me in a provocative way. I found it unnerving, but I smiled to be friendly.
"She then cosied alongside me by the mirror and asked to borrow my lip-gloss. I agreed, put some on my finger and let her rub it on. She rolled her eyes and giggled before suggestively rubbing it over her lips. It became clear she was flirting.
"She then asked for some more and kind of leaned into me and glared intensely. I thought she was hoping to get me closer to her. When I told Kevin he nodded and said, ‘Knowing her, she probably was'. I was shocked that she'd try to pick up someone in a toilet. I presume she's bisexual. I threw away the lip-gloss after that, thinking how tacky her behaviour was." Nicole revealed doting dad Kevin has created a real family home for his children.
She said: "Kevin has made a point of surrounding himself with genuine and pleasant people. Unlike Britney's place, his seven-bedroom mansion is a real home for him and his children.
"He has a housekeeper, cleaner and string of staff in all the time. The nanny comes in when needed and it makes for a real family environment. When you walk in you go into a hallway and there are pictures of him with his kids everywhere. There are the kids' toys stacked up including Sean's plastic truck which he rides around in the house. Jayden has his little cuddly toys in boxes as well. In the backyard the kids have a huge jungle gym activity kit, which they play with."
Nicole revealed Kevin has bedrooms not only for Sean and Jayden but also for his kids by former partner Shar Jackson—Kori, five, and three-year-old Kaleb.
She said: "Each of the lads has a bed in the shape of a Ferrari. The walls are painted with animals and shapes and are full up with toys. Sean's room has a big toy train set around the outside. Jayden still has trouble sleeping, so Kevin has put an extra Ferrari bed in his own bedroom."
Nicole slammed claims that Kevin is a wild-partying gold-digger.
The former Playboy Playmate said: "He may have been a party animal in the past, but I haven't seen him talk about or take drugs. He does like a bourbon and Coke, but he'll have a couple of those and call it a night. He has his home and that's where he spends most of his time now."
This weekend, Britney and Kevin were each spending one day with their children.
On Friday, after a three-hour hearing attended by the couple, Superior Court Commissioner Scott Gordon postponed a decision on Britney's application to win back custody of the boys. At one point a clearly disturbed Britney ran out of the court yelling: "Eat it, lick it, snort it, f*** it."
Nicole said: "I feel sorry for Britney. She has lost the love of a very caring, passionate and intelligent man. At the moment his priority is fighting for his children."
Wednesday, October 10, 2007
Monday, October 08, 2007
"The Discerning Gentleman's Guide to Gangbang Etiquette"
by The Cowboy Detective
So you've been invited to an orgy. Congratulations!
The following guide should help you navigate the treacherous waters of gangbang etiquette and avoid those common faux pas that can turn perfectly delightful public sex with random strangers into a semen-stained social embarrassment.
What To Bring
Most orgy invitations will specify what, if anything, should be brought by the attendees. Read everything carved into the bathroom stall door to make sure you didn't miss any important details. Aside from a raging boner and a dish to pass, here is a list of other things you might want to consider:
-Cock ring
-Personal lubricant
-Shitload of hand sanitizer
-Armadillo, declawed
-Duct tape
-Viking helmet
-Not AIDS
Arriving
Always be punctual when attending a gangbang. (This will be the only time during the evening when coming early is actually encouraged!) Remember, there are dozens of people you don't know waiting for you to stick parts of your body in them. It is rude to make them wait. Showing up late not only reflects poorly on you, but also prevents you from getting in on the action from the beginning. Few things are more awkward than trying to strike up an ice-breaking conversation with a woman who already has some other dude's junk jammed in her throat.
And while it's not exactly considered rude to already have your cock out when you arrive, you should make the effort to dress it up a bit. The sight of a naked man with an engorged penis unceremoniously stumbling into a room full of strangers can be unpleasant and awkward. A little pirate hat or some flame decals down the sides are nice touches and make it more fun for everyone.
Choosing Partners
As stated above, it is best to arrive early. This will allow you the opportunity to meet and assess potential partners, and discuss any specialties, favorites, and taboos. Nothing is more embarrassing than finding out the hard way your partner does not enjoy it when you shit on her back.
Also, don't be afraid to learn some names! Instead of saying, "Take this face fucking, you cockslut!" most women prefer that you say, "Take this face fucking, Pam! You cockslut." It's the personal touch that will guarantee you future opportunities to fuck her face.
Be open-minded with your selections. While most men will be lining up to throw a shot into the attractive women, you should find yourself a woman who, while being substantially uglier, will most likely have low enough self-esteem to let you do some seriously fucked up shit to her. Remember, what a woman looks like is entirely inconsequential. Aside from being the place where she keeps a suckhole, her face has little purpose beyond serving as a resting place for your fatigued genitals.
A gangbang is all about variety. Try not to get locked into the same four or five snatches and buttholes. Mix it up a little bit!
The Fucking
Once an orgy begins, it quickly becomes a room full of flying dicks and tits, and it's easy to get caught up in all the dick-and-tit-flying and forget your manners. Here are some guidelines to help you avoid common mistakes usually made while fucking.
A Modicum of Foreplay is Always Appreciated
At a gangbang, it is certainly not expected that you bring a woman flowers, but on the other hand, you don't want to just mount her and start jackhammering her twat like a monkey on angel dust. Women in general like a little romance and tenderness, and some doped-up skank writhing around in a dimly-lit furnished basement is no exception.
Mouth kissing is usually acceptable, but very risky in a group sex setting, and therefore not recommended. Depending on where her mouth was (or more importantly what was in it) just prior to your encounter will make the difference between a pleasant pre-sex interaction and getting a mouthful of cum belch. Kissing other parts of her body runs similar risks. Absent a black light, you must assume any woman with whom you engage is currently coated entirely in dried spunk.
Fondling and rubbing is a tolerable solution, but still runs the risk of getting semen into your eyes, mouth, and mucous membranes through incidental secondary contact. A quick tit slap or a poke in the neck with your cock will alleviate much of this risk and still accomplish the goal of tactile arousal.
Remember, as much as you want to be polite and get a woman properly aroused, you also want to avoid touching her jizz-sprayed body as much as possible.
Assplay is by Invitation Only
Whether it's your big toe, car keys, or some other chick's face, it is the height of rudeness to stick anything into someone else's asshole without permission. A simple, "Pardon me miss, but do you mind if I slam this into your pooper?" will not only be appreciated for its thoughtfulness, but can also help prevent a situation where you are injured by something that might already be up there. You must treat each asshole you encounter with the respect it deserves.
Don't Fuck Other Dudes
I really can't stress this enough. I know when you've got a boner that could punch a hole through a cinder block and the only available place to stick it is some other guy's stink winker, it seems pretty tempting. But remember, this is a gangbang, not Ben Affleck's tool shed. Try to exhibit some class.
Aside from the obvious anal and oral sex restrictions, dick-on-dick contact is also strictly prohibited. Incidental cock bumping is to be expected, but never acknowledged, and never prolonged. The commonly accepted time limit for dick touching is about three seconds.
Understandably, there are certain multiple-partner sexual positions where the men outnumber the women that will involve some inevitable ball touching and sack friction. This is unavoidable, and therefore acceptable. But again, sexual contact with other men should never be intentional and always kept to a minimum. And remember, never, ever make eye contact with a man whose genitals are touching yours. That moment could haunt you for the rest of your life.
The exception to this rule is, of course, if it was explicitly stated to be "that kind of party" and you're into "that sort of thing." Then you can do whatever you want, you fucking homo.
Always Thank Your Partner
It is a widespread misconception that not ejaculating directly into a woman's eyes or nostrils is thanks enough for letting you work her lady parts like a prizefighter on a speed bag. The rules of common courtesy say otherwise. Just because you did things to her that wouldn’t be appropriate to do to a goat at an Alabama house-warming is no reason to be rude.
A simple "Thanks for letting me fuck you so much," followed by a cock-slap to the ass is acceptable, if a bit curt. Remember, a little extra politeness doesn’t cost you anything, and can make some ridiculous jizzrag feel good about herself for a change.
"I came so hard I think my dick went back in time," or "If Jesus had a pussy as sweet as yours, the Jews might not have murdered him," are imaginative and memorable ways to express your gratitude. Remember, a cheap whore is always a good time, but a cheap whore who feels appreciated makes a more pleasant evening for everyone.
Don't Touch the Stereo
You are a guest and it is disrespectful to your host. Also, it's probably covered in semen.
The Grand Finale
This, of course, is the whole reason why you’re here: to orgasm in public. It’s easy to get lost in the moment and do something that will embarrass you or other guests at the fuck party. Don’t let your manners shoot out of your dick along with all that busted nut!
First comes the announcement. It’s good to make a show of it to let people know how much you are enjoying yourself, and it also allows any nearby women to get their faces into position. Simply yelling, "I’m coming!" is trite and clichéd. Something more colorful like, "Sweet Molly, it’s a cold night in Tucson!" or "Eat my dick bullets!" can serve as a real attention getter and let everyone know how excited the idea of ejaculating in front of them makes you. This will get them excited as well, and everyone will have a good time as you spray the room with your ball juice.
Next is to carefully consider where to launch your cock splatter. It is a good idea to practice at home ahead of time as much as possible so you can properly determine distance and volume. With those measurements in mind, always try to aim your exploding man cannon onto as many women within range as possible.
Don’t worry if the woman is not facing you or doesn’t seem particularly interested in having you shoot your love chowder onto her. Rules of gangbang etiquette dictate that your earlier announcement is more than sufficient warning. After all, if a woman doesn’t want you to blow dick snot all over her back and into her hair, why is she even there?
And it is very important to remember that the restrictions against sexual contact with other men include not jizzing on each other. If you and another male participant are preparing to porkblast on the same chick at the same time, it is always preferable to take turns. If that does not seem feasible, then you must always make sure to not position yourselves directly across from one another and aim down. Nothing ruins an otherwise pleasant evening faster than a navel-full of some other guy’s splooge.
Final Thought
With a little practice and mindfulness, proper gangbang etiquette will become second nature. The most important thing to remember is to have fun! After all, what kind of hopeless faggot can't enjoy a night of banging some nasty-ass bitches?
Happy humping!
from http://www.juvenilecomedy.com/gangbang.htm
So you've been invited to an orgy. Congratulations!
The following guide should help you navigate the treacherous waters of gangbang etiquette and avoid those common faux pas that can turn perfectly delightful public sex with random strangers into a semen-stained social embarrassment.
What To Bring
Most orgy invitations will specify what, if anything, should be brought by the attendees. Read everything carved into the bathroom stall door to make sure you didn't miss any important details. Aside from a raging boner and a dish to pass, here is a list of other things you might want to consider:
-Cock ring
-Personal lubricant
-Shitload of hand sanitizer
-Armadillo, declawed
-Duct tape
-Viking helmet
-Not AIDS
Arriving
Always be punctual when attending a gangbang. (This will be the only time during the evening when coming early is actually encouraged!) Remember, there are dozens of people you don't know waiting for you to stick parts of your body in them. It is rude to make them wait. Showing up late not only reflects poorly on you, but also prevents you from getting in on the action from the beginning. Few things are more awkward than trying to strike up an ice-breaking conversation with a woman who already has some other dude's junk jammed in her throat.
And while it's not exactly considered rude to already have your cock out when you arrive, you should make the effort to dress it up a bit. The sight of a naked man with an engorged penis unceremoniously stumbling into a room full of strangers can be unpleasant and awkward. A little pirate hat or some flame decals down the sides are nice touches and make it more fun for everyone.
Choosing Partners
As stated above, it is best to arrive early. This will allow you the opportunity to meet and assess potential partners, and discuss any specialties, favorites, and taboos. Nothing is more embarrassing than finding out the hard way your partner does not enjoy it when you shit on her back.
Also, don't be afraid to learn some names! Instead of saying, "Take this face fucking, you cockslut!" most women prefer that you say, "Take this face fucking, Pam! You cockslut." It's the personal touch that will guarantee you future opportunities to fuck her face.
Be open-minded with your selections. While most men will be lining up to throw a shot into the attractive women, you should find yourself a woman who, while being substantially uglier, will most likely have low enough self-esteem to let you do some seriously fucked up shit to her. Remember, what a woman looks like is entirely inconsequential. Aside from being the place where she keeps a suckhole, her face has little purpose beyond serving as a resting place for your fatigued genitals.
A gangbang is all about variety. Try not to get locked into the same four or five snatches and buttholes. Mix it up a little bit!
The Fucking
Once an orgy begins, it quickly becomes a room full of flying dicks and tits, and it's easy to get caught up in all the dick-and-tit-flying and forget your manners. Here are some guidelines to help you avoid common mistakes usually made while fucking.
A Modicum of Foreplay is Always Appreciated
At a gangbang, it is certainly not expected that you bring a woman flowers, but on the other hand, you don't want to just mount her and start jackhammering her twat like a monkey on angel dust. Women in general like a little romance and tenderness, and some doped-up skank writhing around in a dimly-lit furnished basement is no exception.
Mouth kissing is usually acceptable, but very risky in a group sex setting, and therefore not recommended. Depending on where her mouth was (or more importantly what was in it) just prior to your encounter will make the difference between a pleasant pre-sex interaction and getting a mouthful of cum belch. Kissing other parts of her body runs similar risks. Absent a black light, you must assume any woman with whom you engage is currently coated entirely in dried spunk.
Fondling and rubbing is a tolerable solution, but still runs the risk of getting semen into your eyes, mouth, and mucous membranes through incidental secondary contact. A quick tit slap or a poke in the neck with your cock will alleviate much of this risk and still accomplish the goal of tactile arousal.
Remember, as much as you want to be polite and get a woman properly aroused, you also want to avoid touching her jizz-sprayed body as much as possible.
Assplay is by Invitation Only
Whether it's your big toe, car keys, or some other chick's face, it is the height of rudeness to stick anything into someone else's asshole without permission. A simple, "Pardon me miss, but do you mind if I slam this into your pooper?" will not only be appreciated for its thoughtfulness, but can also help prevent a situation where you are injured by something that might already be up there. You must treat each asshole you encounter with the respect it deserves.
Don't Fuck Other Dudes
I really can't stress this enough. I know when you've got a boner that could punch a hole through a cinder block and the only available place to stick it is some other guy's stink winker, it seems pretty tempting. But remember, this is a gangbang, not Ben Affleck's tool shed. Try to exhibit some class.
Aside from the obvious anal and oral sex restrictions, dick-on-dick contact is also strictly prohibited. Incidental cock bumping is to be expected, but never acknowledged, and never prolonged. The commonly accepted time limit for dick touching is about three seconds.
Understandably, there are certain multiple-partner sexual positions where the men outnumber the women that will involve some inevitable ball touching and sack friction. This is unavoidable, and therefore acceptable. But again, sexual contact with other men should never be intentional and always kept to a minimum. And remember, never, ever make eye contact with a man whose genitals are touching yours. That moment could haunt you for the rest of your life.
The exception to this rule is, of course, if it was explicitly stated to be "that kind of party" and you're into "that sort of thing." Then you can do whatever you want, you fucking homo.
Always Thank Your Partner
It is a widespread misconception that not ejaculating directly into a woman's eyes or nostrils is thanks enough for letting you work her lady parts like a prizefighter on a speed bag. The rules of common courtesy say otherwise. Just because you did things to her that wouldn’t be appropriate to do to a goat at an Alabama house-warming is no reason to be rude.
A simple "Thanks for letting me fuck you so much," followed by a cock-slap to the ass is acceptable, if a bit curt. Remember, a little extra politeness doesn’t cost you anything, and can make some ridiculous jizzrag feel good about herself for a change.
"I came so hard I think my dick went back in time," or "If Jesus had a pussy as sweet as yours, the Jews might not have murdered him," are imaginative and memorable ways to express your gratitude. Remember, a cheap whore is always a good time, but a cheap whore who feels appreciated makes a more pleasant evening for everyone.
Don't Touch the Stereo
You are a guest and it is disrespectful to your host. Also, it's probably covered in semen.
The Grand Finale
This, of course, is the whole reason why you’re here: to orgasm in public. It’s easy to get lost in the moment and do something that will embarrass you or other guests at the fuck party. Don’t let your manners shoot out of your dick along with all that busted nut!
First comes the announcement. It’s good to make a show of it to let people know how much you are enjoying yourself, and it also allows any nearby women to get their faces into position. Simply yelling, "I’m coming!" is trite and clichéd. Something more colorful like, "Sweet Molly, it’s a cold night in Tucson!" or "Eat my dick bullets!" can serve as a real attention getter and let everyone know how excited the idea of ejaculating in front of them makes you. This will get them excited as well, and everyone will have a good time as you spray the room with your ball juice.
Next is to carefully consider where to launch your cock splatter. It is a good idea to practice at home ahead of time as much as possible so you can properly determine distance and volume. With those measurements in mind, always try to aim your exploding man cannon onto as many women within range as possible.
Don’t worry if the woman is not facing you or doesn’t seem particularly interested in having you shoot your love chowder onto her. Rules of gangbang etiquette dictate that your earlier announcement is more than sufficient warning. After all, if a woman doesn’t want you to blow dick snot all over her back and into her hair, why is she even there?
And it is very important to remember that the restrictions against sexual contact with other men include not jizzing on each other. If you and another male participant are preparing to porkblast on the same chick at the same time, it is always preferable to take turns. If that does not seem feasible, then you must always make sure to not position yourselves directly across from one another and aim down. Nothing ruins an otherwise pleasant evening faster than a navel-full of some other guy’s splooge.
Final Thought
With a little practice and mindfulness, proper gangbang etiquette will become second nature. The most important thing to remember is to have fun! After all, what kind of hopeless faggot can't enjoy a night of banging some nasty-ass bitches?
Happy humping!
from http://www.juvenilecomedy.com/gangbang.htm
Friday, October 05, 2007
Check Out This Great Deal On CraigsList!
Click Here!
Original 1962 Gibson Air Guitar - $750
Reply to: sale-440860587@craigslist.org
Date: 2007-10-05, 9:49AM PDT
Well I recently got a new job and I never have time to play anymore so I guess its time to get rid of my baby...This is an original 1962 Gibson Les Paul air guitar...NOT a knock off!!! I've seen replicas sell for $500+...imagine what you could get for the real deal!! It's got an amazing sound and the quality of craftsmanship is unmatched. A true one of a kind piece! I have an air amp that I'll throw in for free to whoever the lucky buyer is. I posted pics below so you could see how amazing this deal really is. Don't hesitate cause this baby will not last.
Original 1962 Gibson Air Guitar - $750
Reply to: sale-440860587@craigslist.org
Date: 2007-10-05, 9:49AM PDT
Well I recently got a new job and I never have time to play anymore so I guess its time to get rid of my baby...This is an original 1962 Gibson Les Paul air guitar...NOT a knock off!!! I've seen replicas sell for $500+...imagine what you could get for the real deal!! It's got an amazing sound and the quality of craftsmanship is unmatched. A true one of a kind piece! I have an air amp that I'll throw in for free to whoever the lucky buyer is. I posted pics below so you could see how amazing this deal really is. Don't hesitate cause this baby will not last.
Monday, October 01, 2007
EVA LONGORIA SEX TAPE ON THE INTERNET?
If the video is real, it could become the most sought porn movie on the Internet.
Eva Longoria has been panicking the last couple of days because her sex video started circling the Internet. It has been rumoured that the “juicy” video contains explicit sex scenes between Eva and her husband, Tony Parker.
If the video is real it could become the most sought porn film on the Internet after the well-known “One Night in Paris” with Paris Hilton in the lead role.
Currently the video is available for viewing only on some American web sites for a fee.
Eva Longoria has been panicking the last couple of days because her sex video started circling the Internet. It has been rumoured that the “juicy” video contains explicit sex scenes between Eva and her husband, Tony Parker.
If the video is real it could become the most sought porn film on the Internet after the well-known “One Night in Paris” with Paris Hilton in the lead role.
Currently the video is available for viewing only on some American web sites for a fee.
Tuesday, September 25, 2007
ClubJadaFire.com
Jada Fire's only official website is now open - visit Jada at www.clubjadafire.com. Live webcames are coming soon!
Tuesday, September 18, 2007
The Squeeze Finally Put on The Juice - He's Behind Bars
This summary is not available. Please
click here to view the post.
The Squeeze Finally Put on The Juice - He's Behind Bars
This summary is not available. Please
click here to view the post.
Wednesday, September 05, 2007
SHAQ'S WIFE CHEATED WITH CUBAN TRAINER???
From MediaTakeOut.com
September 05, 2007. Yesterday evening Miami Heat center Shaquille O'Neal (35) filed to divorce his wife of nearly five years, Shaunie (32). The two seemed like the perfect couple to most outside observers.
This seemingly out-of-nowhere filing has people all over the sports world are wondering what could have happened. Well MediaTakeOut.com got the inside scoop on what really went down!!!
In an exclusive interview, MediaTakeOut.com spoke with one of Shaq's employee's who claims that Shaq suspects Shaunie of being unfaithful. According to the insider, Shaq is accusing his wife of carrying on an affair with her 27 year old personal trainer.
The trainer, who is of native Cuban descent, has been training Shaq's wife for nearly a year.
According to our insider, Shaunie has been increasing the frequency of private training sessions ever since the spring. The insider tells MediaTakeOut.com, "Shaunie and [the trainer] started off having weekly sessions. But they increased the number of sessions until she was seeing him almost every day." The insider added, "I'm not saying that there was anything inappropriate going on between them, but they were very close. So I can understand where Shaq is coming from ... Whatever was going on between them, it just didn't look right."
Shaq's employee isn't convinced, however, that Shaq's marriage is over. The insider explained, "Right now Shaq filed [for divorce] because he's angry. But the way that those two love each other, I'm convinced the marriage can be saved." Our source continued, "Besides, Shaq has a few skeletons in his closet himself - and there's just too much [history] between them for either to walk away this easily."
But if this divorce ever does get to court, it may get ugly. Shaq's pit bull lawyers have made the first move. They've already requested that Shaunie O’Neal to provide a “correct accounting of all money, funds, stocks, bonds, and other securities” that she had access to or obtained during the marriage.
Shaq and Shaunie have four children together -- Shareef, 7, Amirah, 5, Shaqir, 4, and Me'Arah, 1. Shaq has a daughter, Taahirah, and Shaunie has a son, Myles, from previous relationships.
Wednesday, August 29, 2007
30 Best Porn Titles Of All Time
In no particular order...
1. POKE-A-HOT-ASS
2. YO QUIERO TACO SMELL
3. DUDE, WHERE'S MY DILDO?
4. BOWLIN' IN HER COLON
5. ASS-HOLE O MIO
6. FUCK THE CANUCK
7. MOULIN SPLOOGE
8. GERMAN WHORE FARE
9. SHE'S NOT A LESBIAN ... SHE'S A VAGITARIAN
10. ONE FELL INTO THE POO-POO'S NEST
11. POKE 'ER MON
12. RIMMERAMA
13. HOOTERS AND THE BLOWJOBS
14. HUNG WANKENSTEIN
15. SHRIMPIN' LOBSTER SAUCE
16. AMERICAN BOOTY
17. E-THREE - THE EXTRA TESTICLE
18. BUMPIN DONUTS
19. H.R. MUFF N' STUFF
20. MAY THE FORESKIN BE WITH YOU
21. WILLIE WANKER AND THE FUDGE PACKING FACTORY
22. ADVENTURES OF THE FART BITCHES
23. BEVERLY HILLS 9021-HO
24. I SAW MOMMY EATING SANTA CLAUS
25. 21 HUMP STREET
26. SPERMS OF ENDEARMENT
27. YANK MY DOODLE, IT'S A DANDY
28. INDIANA JOAN AND THE BLACK HOLE OF MAMMOO
29. SHAVING RYAN'S PRIVATES
30. EDWARD PENISHANDS
1. POKE-A-HOT-ASS
2. YO QUIERO TACO SMELL
3. DUDE, WHERE'S MY DILDO?
4. BOWLIN' IN HER COLON
5. ASS-HOLE O MIO
6. FUCK THE CANUCK
7. MOULIN SPLOOGE
8. GERMAN WHORE FARE
9. SHE'S NOT A LESBIAN ... SHE'S A VAGITARIAN
10. ONE FELL INTO THE POO-POO'S NEST
11. POKE 'ER MON
12. RIMMERAMA
13. HOOTERS AND THE BLOWJOBS
14. HUNG WANKENSTEIN
15. SHRIMPIN' LOBSTER SAUCE
16. AMERICAN BOOTY
17. E-THREE - THE EXTRA TESTICLE
18. BUMPIN DONUTS
19. H.R. MUFF N' STUFF
20. MAY THE FORESKIN BE WITH YOU
21. WILLIE WANKER AND THE FUDGE PACKING FACTORY
22. ADVENTURES OF THE FART BITCHES
23. BEVERLY HILLS 9021-HO
24. I SAW MOMMY EATING SANTA CLAUS
25. 21 HUMP STREET
26. SPERMS OF ENDEARMENT
27. YANK MY DOODLE, IT'S A DANDY
28. INDIANA JOAN AND THE BLACK HOLE OF MAMMOO
29. SHAVING RYAN'S PRIVATES
30. EDWARD PENISHANDS
Thursday, August 23, 2007
Jenna Jameson And Her New Boobs Retiring???
Jenna Jameson is retiring from making adult videos. Sigh.
She will continue to run her online business, but the blonde wants to focus on new projects, like a Hollywood biopic, a comic book and a clothing line, due out next year.
Jameson also decided to have her breast implants removed recently, and she sat down with Us Weekly to talk about why she did it.
Here are some highlights!
On why she had her implants removed: “When I had implants, I felt uncomfortable. I would be shy at the beach. I know it sounds funny, but I’d wear high-necked clothes – unless I was at an adult-film convention. So I thought, Why don’t I be who I am and get my real ones back?”
On how removing the implants changed her: “Even for women with naturally large boobs, getting a reduction is so freeing. I feel like I can stand up straighter…before, when I jogged, I had to hold my boobs. I looked like I was molesting myself!”
On how she felt postsurgery: “Ecstatic. The first thing I did when I got home was open my bra. I wasn’t supposed to but I did. I was so happy, I cried. It was like looking into the mirror when I was 17.”
On whether she’s done with porn forever: “Yes. A hundred percent.”
On who will play her in a movie about her life: “I would love Scarlett Johansson to play me. I think Rachel McAdams is amazing, and Sienna Miller.”
On celebrating her one-year anniversary with boyfriend Tito: “I had my surgery while he was in Iraq on a USO tour. He was so excited: ‘I’m coming home to brand new boobies.’”
She will continue to run her online business, but the blonde wants to focus on new projects, like a Hollywood biopic, a comic book and a clothing line, due out next year.
Jameson also decided to have her breast implants removed recently, and she sat down with Us Weekly to talk about why she did it.
Here are some highlights!
On why she had her implants removed: “When I had implants, I felt uncomfortable. I would be shy at the beach. I know it sounds funny, but I’d wear high-necked clothes – unless I was at an adult-film convention. So I thought, Why don’t I be who I am and get my real ones back?”
On how removing the implants changed her: “Even for women with naturally large boobs, getting a reduction is so freeing. I feel like I can stand up straighter…before, when I jogged, I had to hold my boobs. I looked like I was molesting myself!”
On how she felt postsurgery: “Ecstatic. The first thing I did when I got home was open my bra. I wasn’t supposed to but I did. I was so happy, I cried. It was like looking into the mirror when I was 17.”
On whether she’s done with porn forever: “Yes. A hundred percent.”
On who will play her in a movie about her life: “I would love Scarlett Johansson to play me. I think Rachel McAdams is amazing, and Sienna Miller.”
On celebrating her one-year anniversary with boyfriend Tito: “I had my surgery while he was in Iraq on a USO tour. He was so excited: ‘I’m coming home to brand new boobies.’”
Wednesday, August 22, 2007
Tuesday, August 14, 2007
Weekend Fun: The Humping Dog Flash Drive
It costs roughly 9 bucks. Of course the movie above, in no way does this ultimate stocking stuffer justice.… Unfortunately, there’s no “Stop Humping” switch, so it just doesn’t stop - kinda like your neighbor’s dog.
Tuesday, August 07, 2007
Why I Fired My Secretary -
Last Week Was My Birthday And I Didn't Feel Very Well Waking Up That Morning. I Went Downstairs For Breakfast Hoping My Wife Would Be Pleasant And Say, "Happy Birthday!", And Possibly Have A Present For Me.
As It Turned Out, She Barely Said Good Morning, Let Alone "Happy Birthday."
I Thought... Well, That's Marriage For You, But The Kids Will Remember. My Kids Came to Breakfast And Didn't Say A Word. So When I Left For The Office, I Was Feeling Pretty Low And Somewhat Despondent.
As I Walked Into My Office, My Secretary Jane Said, "Good Morning, Boss, Happy Birthday!" It Felt A Little Better That At Least Someone Had Remembered.
I Worked Until one O'clock and Then Jane Knocked On My Door And Said, "You Know, It's Such A Beautiful Day Outside, And It's Your Birthday, Let's Go Out To Lunch, Just You And Me." I Said, "Thanks Jane, That's The Greatest Thing I've Heard All Day. Let's Go!"
We Went To Lunch. But We Didn't Go Where We Normally Would Go. We Dined Instead At A Little Place With A Private Table. We Had Two Martinis Each And I Enjoyed The Meal Tremendously.
On The Way Back To The Office, Jane Said, "You Know, It's Such A Beautiful Day.. We Don't Need To Go Back To The Office, Do We?"
I Responded, "I Guess Not. What Do You Have In Mind?"
She Said, "Let's Go To My Apartment"
After Arriving At Her Apartment Jane Turned To Me And Said, "Boss, If You Don't Mind, I'm Going To Step Into The Bedroom For A Moment. I'll Be Right Back."
"Ok." I Nervously Replied.
She Went Into The Bedroom And, After A Couple Of Minutes, She Came Out Carrying A Huge Birthday Cake... Followed By My Wife, Kids, And Dozens Of My Friends And Co-Workers, All Singing "Happy Birthday".
And I Just Sat There..
On The Couch...
Naked.
As It Turned Out, She Barely Said Good Morning, Let Alone "Happy Birthday."
I Thought... Well, That's Marriage For You, But The Kids Will Remember. My Kids Came to Breakfast And Didn't Say A Word. So When I Left For The Office, I Was Feeling Pretty Low And Somewhat Despondent.
As I Walked Into My Office, My Secretary Jane Said, "Good Morning, Boss, Happy Birthday!" It Felt A Little Better That At Least Someone Had Remembered.
I Worked Until one O'clock and Then Jane Knocked On My Door And Said, "You Know, It's Such A Beautiful Day Outside, And It's Your Birthday, Let's Go Out To Lunch, Just You And Me." I Said, "Thanks Jane, That's The Greatest Thing I've Heard All Day. Let's Go!"
We Went To Lunch. But We Didn't Go Where We Normally Would Go. We Dined Instead At A Little Place With A Private Table. We Had Two Martinis Each And I Enjoyed The Meal Tremendously.
On The Way Back To The Office, Jane Said, "You Know, It's Such A Beautiful Day.. We Don't Need To Go Back To The Office, Do We?"
I Responded, "I Guess Not. What Do You Have In Mind?"
She Said, "Let's Go To My Apartment"
After Arriving At Her Apartment Jane Turned To Me And Said, "Boss, If You Don't Mind, I'm Going To Step Into The Bedroom For A Moment. I'll Be Right Back."
"Ok." I Nervously Replied.
She Went Into The Bedroom And, After A Couple Of Minutes, She Came Out Carrying A Huge Birthday Cake... Followed By My Wife, Kids, And Dozens Of My Friends And Co-Workers, All Singing "Happy Birthday".
And I Just Sat There..
On The Couch...
Naked.
Tuesday, July 24, 2007
Lindsay Lohan Busted AGAIN!
BEVERLY HILLS, California — Troubled starlet Lindsay Lohan was busted early Tuesday for possession of cocaine, driving under the influence, transporting a narcotic into a custodial facility and driving on a suspended license -- her second substance-related arrest in a matter of months, TMZ.com reported.
Lohan's blood alcohol level was between .12 and .13, well over the .08 legal limit, and cocaine was found in her pants pocket, cops told TMZ.com.
The 21-year-old actress’ arrest happened about 2:15 a.m. in Santa Monica, Calif., near Pico Boulevard and Main Street, according to TMZ.com.
Lohan checked out of a Malibu rehab center on July 13, after a stay of more than six weeks. She has been wearing an alcohol-monitoring ankle bracelet, going to Alcoholics Anonymous meetings and receiving therapy ever since.
The "Mean Girls" star, who turned 21 on July 2, checked into the swank facility after a wild Memorial Day weekend during which she crashed her Mercedes Benz into a curb, was arrested on suspicion of driving under the influence and was photographed slumped in the passenger seat of a friend's car.
Just last Thursday, Lohan turned herself in to police to be booked on suspicion of driving under the influence during the Memorial Day weekend car crash, police said.
Accompanied by her attorney, Lohan surrendered herself at the Beverly Hills Police Department to be fingerprinted and photographed, said Officer Brian Ballieweg.
She was booked on suspicion of a DUI with a blood alcohol level above .08, California's legal limit, and on suspicion of misdemeanor hit and run, Ballieweg said.
After the Memorial Day incident, police said she had been arrested for investigation of driving under the influence, though she wasn't formally booked on the allegation until Thursday.
The actress was released on her own recognizance. A court date was scheduled for August 24.
Lohan said in January she had checked into a rehabilitation center for substance abuse treatment.
Earlier this month, Lohan's publicist Leslie Sloane Zelnik said the star was "doing great."
"Lindsay is working hard on her sobriety and we are all supporting her," she said.
Lohan's blood alcohol level was between .12 and .13, well over the .08 legal limit, and cocaine was found in her pants pocket, cops told TMZ.com.
The 21-year-old actress’ arrest happened about 2:15 a.m. in Santa Monica, Calif., near Pico Boulevard and Main Street, according to TMZ.com.
Lohan checked out of a Malibu rehab center on July 13, after a stay of more than six weeks. She has been wearing an alcohol-monitoring ankle bracelet, going to Alcoholics Anonymous meetings and receiving therapy ever since.
The "Mean Girls" star, who turned 21 on July 2, checked into the swank facility after a wild Memorial Day weekend during which she crashed her Mercedes Benz into a curb, was arrested on suspicion of driving under the influence and was photographed slumped in the passenger seat of a friend's car.
Just last Thursday, Lohan turned herself in to police to be booked on suspicion of driving under the influence during the Memorial Day weekend car crash, police said.
Accompanied by her attorney, Lohan surrendered herself at the Beverly Hills Police Department to be fingerprinted and photographed, said Officer Brian Ballieweg.
She was booked on suspicion of a DUI with a blood alcohol level above .08, California's legal limit, and on suspicion of misdemeanor hit and run, Ballieweg said.
After the Memorial Day incident, police said she had been arrested for investigation of driving under the influence, though she wasn't formally booked on the allegation until Thursday.
The actress was released on her own recognizance. A court date was scheduled for August 24.
Lohan said in January she had checked into a rehabilitation center for substance abuse treatment.
Earlier this month, Lohan's publicist Leslie Sloane Zelnik said the star was "doing great."
"Lindsay is working hard on her sobriety and we are all supporting her," she said.
Thursday, July 05, 2007
METRO RELAUNCHES TOXXXIC LINE WITH NEW PACKAGING
CHATSWORTH, Calif. -
Metro Interactive has set a July 13 street date for Slime Ballin', a 2-disc collector's edition DVD that marks the return of gonzo imprint Toxxxic Entertainment following a two-year hiatus.
Touting the new release as "the raunchiest and most visually interesting production from Toxxxic to date," Metro spared no expense to create a graphically striking DVD package.
"We wanted to come up with a package that would correlate to some of the things that make this movie different," said Christian Mann, Metro's VP of Sales & Marketing. "Knowing it was filled with heavy-duty raunch, as is the hallmark of Toxxxic Entertainment, our artists were charged with making a package that would showcase the scope of the production. There was no way to display all the images
on a traditional DVD insert sleeve. Since the word Toxxxic is evocative of something radioactive, and we had this incredible black-light scene, the decision to go with a six color neon design package was an obvious one. While we were at it we went all the way and embossed it to give the consumer a great-looking, great-feeling package - something worthy of the contents."
Director Vincent Voss described Slime Ballin' as "a sexually charged acid trip."
"Most people when it comes to gonzo want to light it like a hospital operating room," Voss told AVN. "This movie is a very high-intensity, stylized vignette production that is splashed with a lot of color. The sex is very hard, but people that have seen the trailer on AVN have told me that it's the black lights, the color and the creepiness that put it over the top."
In keeping with the movie's trippy, atmospheric visual style, Metro is promoting the re-launch of Toxxxic with a black light poster campaign. Mann told AVN that the company plans several deluxe edition DVD release in the future with a similar approach.
Slime Ballin' stars Daisy Marie, Kaiya Lynn, Carmel Moore, Lela Star, Nikki Benz, Sativa Rose, Tiffany Sweet, Austin Kincaid, Ben English, Mick Blue, Steve Holmes, Marco Banderas and Scott Nails.
Each copy of Slime Ballin' includes a bonus disc with a surprise full-length Toxxxic feature. Shot in widescreen hi-def, the disc includes behind the scenes vignettes, trailers and instant pop-shot access menu options.
Metro Interactive has set a July 13 street date for Slime Ballin', a 2-disc collector's edition DVD that marks the return of gonzo imprint Toxxxic Entertainment following a two-year hiatus.
Touting the new release as "the raunchiest and most visually interesting production from Toxxxic to date," Metro spared no expense to create a graphically striking DVD package.
"We wanted to come up with a package that would correlate to some of the things that make this movie different," said Christian Mann, Metro's VP of Sales & Marketing. "Knowing it was filled with heavy-duty raunch, as is the hallmark of Toxxxic Entertainment, our artists were charged with making a package that would showcase the scope of the production. There was no way to display all the images
on a traditional DVD insert sleeve. Since the word Toxxxic is evocative of something radioactive, and we had this incredible black-light scene, the decision to go with a six color neon design package was an obvious one. While we were at it we went all the way and embossed it to give the consumer a great-looking, great-feeling package - something worthy of the contents."
Director Vincent Voss described Slime Ballin' as "a sexually charged acid trip."
"Most people when it comes to gonzo want to light it like a hospital operating room," Voss told AVN. "This movie is a very high-intensity, stylized vignette production that is splashed with a lot of color. The sex is very hard, but people that have seen the trailer on AVN have told me that it's the black lights, the color and the creepiness that put it over the top."
In keeping with the movie's trippy, atmospheric visual style, Metro is promoting the re-launch of Toxxxic with a black light poster campaign. Mann told AVN that the company plans several deluxe edition DVD release in the future with a similar approach.
Slime Ballin' stars Daisy Marie, Kaiya Lynn, Carmel Moore, Lela Star, Nikki Benz, Sativa Rose, Tiffany Sweet, Austin Kincaid, Ben English, Mick Blue, Steve Holmes, Marco Banderas and Scott Nails.
Each copy of Slime Ballin' includes a bonus disc with a surprise full-length Toxxxic feature. Shot in widescreen hi-def, the disc includes behind the scenes vignettes, trailers and instant pop-shot access menu options.
Wednesday, June 27, 2007
Wanna Be In Porn?
Click Here For The Boxcover Image
HOW TO BREAK INTO THE PORN INDUSTRY IS NOW AVAILABLE ONLINE AT AMAZON.COM, ORDER YOUR COPY NOW IN ADVANCE.
WITHIN THIS REVEALING LOOK INTO THE WORLD OF ADULT ENTERTAINMENT, FORMER ADULT FILM DIRECTOR C. L. GREGORY EXPLAINS HOW SEX HAS BECOME AN ECONOMIC FORCE IN TODAY'S MARKETPLACE. IN EACH EYE OPENING CHAPTER YOU'LL DISCOVER HOW ADULT FILMS ARE MADE, THE HISTORY OF ADULT FILMS, THE BUSINESS OF SEX AND MOST IMPORTANTLY HOW TO MAKE MONEY MAKING PORN. YOU'LL FIND OUT WHO THE REAL PLAYERS ARE IN THE BUSINESS AND HOW TO CONTACT THEM. IT'S EVERYTHING YOU NEED TO KNOW WHEN CONSIDERING A CAREER IN THE SEX INDUSTRY. WHETHER YOU'RE AN ASPIRING ADULT ACTOR, DIRECTOR, OR PORN STARLETT WANNABE, HOW TO BREAK INTO THE PORN INDUSTRY WILL GIVE YOU THE TOOLS YOU NEED TO KNOW WHEN MAKING YOUR FIRST ADULT FILM AND HOW TO BE SUCCESSFUL IN ONE OF THE FASTEST GROWING SEGMENTS OF THE ENTERTAINMENT INDUSTRY.
HOW TO BREAK INTO THE PORN INDUSTRY IS NOW AVAILABLE ONLINE AT AMAZON.COM, ORDER YOUR COPY NOW IN ADVANCE.
WITHIN THIS REVEALING LOOK INTO THE WORLD OF ADULT ENTERTAINMENT, FORMER ADULT FILM DIRECTOR C. L. GREGORY EXPLAINS HOW SEX HAS BECOME AN ECONOMIC FORCE IN TODAY'S MARKETPLACE. IN EACH EYE OPENING CHAPTER YOU'LL DISCOVER HOW ADULT FILMS ARE MADE, THE HISTORY OF ADULT FILMS, THE BUSINESS OF SEX AND MOST IMPORTANTLY HOW TO MAKE MONEY MAKING PORN. YOU'LL FIND OUT WHO THE REAL PLAYERS ARE IN THE BUSINESS AND HOW TO CONTACT THEM. IT'S EVERYTHING YOU NEED TO KNOW WHEN CONSIDERING A CAREER IN THE SEX INDUSTRY. WHETHER YOU'RE AN ASPIRING ADULT ACTOR, DIRECTOR, OR PORN STARLETT WANNABE, HOW TO BREAK INTO THE PORN INDUSTRY WILL GIVE YOU THE TOOLS YOU NEED TO KNOW WHEN MAKING YOUR FIRST ADULT FILM AND HOW TO BE SUCCESSFUL IN ONE OF THE FASTEST GROWING SEGMENTS OF THE ENTERTAINMENT INDUSTRY.
Wednesday, June 13, 2007
Paris X-Posed Again
From TheSmokingGun.com
Risque online pics of Hilton reappear despite court injunction
JUNE 11--Defying a federal court injunction, a web site stocked with X-rated home videos and photos of Paris Hilton has recently reopened, apparently in a bid to cash in on the wave of publicity surrounding the hard-partying heiress's legal travails. The web site, parisexposed.com, was shuttered earlier this year after Hilton sued its operators for invasion of privacy and copyright violation. In late-February, U.S. District Court Judge George King signed a preliminary injunction (a copy of which you'll find here) barring the site from publishing a wide assortment of material about the 26-year-old Hilton, from her home and e-mail addresses, to medical and banking records. And, of course, "any picture depicting Plaintiff in a state of undress and in a private setting." Of which there are many, as a weekend tour of the reopened site made quite clear. Along with videos showing Hilton topless and bottomless, the site has clips of her partying and making a series of offensive statements. She refers to one woman as a "fat, ugly Jewish bitch" and uses the phrase "fat faggot" to describe another unseen target. Dancing with her sister Nicky at a New Year's Eve party in Aspen, Hilton mimics another person, announcing, "I'm a little black whore. I get fucked in the butt for coke." Then, remarking on her and Nicky's dancing, Hilton says, "We're like two niggers." These videotaped musings (and a chance to review other records) cost $19.97 for a 30-day period. But if that's too rich for you, we've gathered a sampling of the Hilton trove, which was obtained by the web site's operators after she failed to pay an overdue L.A. storage facility bill. On the following pages you'll find stills from a variety of videos as well as photos and documents. Images include Hilton getting stoned in Amsterdam; toilet stall snaps (one with Nicole Richie); topless script readings; tampon hijinks; candids of a once-fleshy Richie; bathtub frolics; underwear shots; unorthodox tanning bed procedures; a groping by "Girls Gone Wild" boss Joe Francis; public skirt hiking; and a rotund friend with a smile on his belly. Among documents posted on parisexposed.com are a court notice regarding an L.A traffic citation; an e-mail about the purchase of a $175,000 Bentley; a business letter from her father Rick; a U.S. Customs Service document regarding the apparent seizure of 148 tabs of the anti-anxiety drug Xanax; and a pharmacy notice. While it appears that several items (like Hilton's passport) have been removed from the site, much of what remains is covered by Judge King's order.
Risque online pics of Hilton reappear despite court injunction
JUNE 11--Defying a federal court injunction, a web site stocked with X-rated home videos and photos of Paris Hilton has recently reopened, apparently in a bid to cash in on the wave of publicity surrounding the hard-partying heiress's legal travails. The web site, parisexposed.com, was shuttered earlier this year after Hilton sued its operators for invasion of privacy and copyright violation. In late-February, U.S. District Court Judge George King signed a preliminary injunction (a copy of which you'll find here) barring the site from publishing a wide assortment of material about the 26-year-old Hilton, from her home and e-mail addresses, to medical and banking records. And, of course, "any picture depicting Plaintiff in a state of undress and in a private setting." Of which there are many, as a weekend tour of the reopened site made quite clear. Along with videos showing Hilton topless and bottomless, the site has clips of her partying and making a series of offensive statements. She refers to one woman as a "fat, ugly Jewish bitch" and uses the phrase "fat faggot" to describe another unseen target. Dancing with her sister Nicky at a New Year's Eve party in Aspen, Hilton mimics another person, announcing, "I'm a little black whore. I get fucked in the butt for coke." Then, remarking on her and Nicky's dancing, Hilton says, "We're like two niggers." These videotaped musings (and a chance to review other records) cost $19.97 for a 30-day period. But if that's too rich for you, we've gathered a sampling of the Hilton trove, which was obtained by the web site's operators after she failed to pay an overdue L.A. storage facility bill. On the following pages you'll find stills from a variety of videos as well as photos and documents. Images include Hilton getting stoned in Amsterdam; toilet stall snaps (one with Nicole Richie); topless script readings; tampon hijinks; candids of a once-fleshy Richie; bathtub frolics; underwear shots; unorthodox tanning bed procedures; a groping by "Girls Gone Wild" boss Joe Francis; public skirt hiking; and a rotund friend with a smile on his belly. Among documents posted on parisexposed.com are a court notice regarding an L.A traffic citation; an e-mail about the purchase of a $175,000 Bentley; a business letter from her father Rick; a U.S. Customs Service document regarding the apparent seizure of 148 tabs of the anti-anxiety drug Xanax; and a pharmacy notice. While it appears that several items (like Hilton's passport) have been removed from the site, much of what remains is covered by Judge King's order.
Thursday, May 17, 2007
Rob Rotten: Curse the Beasts and the Children
SUN VALLEY, Calif. - Sun Valley, California is the land time forgot. Once off the 5 Freeway, the traveler finds himself transported back to a Twilight Zone world that looks remarkably like 1962. It's here where porn auteur Rob Rotten has chosen to shoot his epic comeback movie for Metro, Swallow My Children.
Up a dusty driveway with signs warning those who venture there to "Watch for Rattlesnakes!" the reporter wonders if he's found the right location. After some uphill hiking, he sees a large trampoline set up in a side yard upon which a fleshy, naked gal is performing oral sex on some hapless stud.
Yep. This must be the place.
The house itself is a sprawling, ramshackle affair and Rotten greets visitors to his set with cold beers and hot pizza.
He gives an overview of the movie while shooting two scenes simultaneously. "It's a 15-scene all blowjob movie," explains Rotten. "It's hilarious. Everything's spontaneous and improvised. The only thing I have for this movie is an approved budget by Metro. That's how I roll with most of my movies."
But production manager Johnny Thrust is starting to show signs of cracking under the stress. Rotten will later relate how Thrust experienced some sort of breakdown much like that of the character Kurtz in Joseph Conrad's Heart of Darkness.
"Some of the girls are getting booked as we speak," explains Rotten, who manages to maintain his own sense of calm.
The only way to rattle Rob Rotten, I'm guessing, is to threaten him with an industrial-sized magnet.
"It's like a ball," Rotten says of his production. "Once it starts rolling, it doesn't stop. So far we've done 5 scenes out of 10 today, so we're half done and right on schedule...well, actually, we're about two hours ahead of schedule."
Of course, the extra time is going to shooting comical setups to the scenes themselves. Rotten explains, "We're having a lot of fun shooting the skits. That's my favorite part. Even though this is just a blowjob movie and even though most people would shoot all the blowjobs in one day, I'd rather take two days and make it real funny and put some time and care into it."
And while the various scenes are being shot, the owner of the location is advising several wide--eyed new starlets that if they like to travel, "China is the place to go. The American dollar is strong there."
One of the girls pipes up with all the confidence and wisdom of her 18 years on planet earth and volunteers, "I've been to China."
"Really?" asks the owner. "Where were you?"
"Japan," she says.
Meanwhile, Rotten's setting up for another blowjob exchange, this time involving himself with Kaylee Love Cox. All I know is that if you worked a circus chimp this hard, you'd be going to jail.
A few days later, Metro exec Christian Mann sends a missive regarding the shoot. It reads, "First, I want to apologize to anyone who may be offended by the title of Rob Rotten's new movie. I want to state unequivocally that absolutely no people were actually swallowed during the production of this movie. True, several million sperm-cells were indeed ingested as they passed through the gullets of several attractive and thirsty—or is it hungry?—ladies. The protein-craving lasses may have used their considerable fellatio skills to lure the little buggers out of the pulsing shafts of the would-be fathers, but it should be noted that absent contact with a fertile ovary, the swimmers cannot technically be considered people and as such, Rob cannot be charged with murder. In fact, Mr. Rotten should be applauded for his contribution to the cause of birth control in an over-populated world. I have no additional comment at this time."
Spoken like a true businessman, indeed.
Swallow My Children will star, among many: Sasha Grey, Daisy Tanks, Britney Stevens, Whitney Stevens, Fayth Deluca, August West, Chavon Taylor, Heather Gables, Marsha Lord, Allison Pierce, Brandi Lyons, Mercedez Santos, Leighiani Red, Roxy DeVille, Laurie Vargas and Jocelyn Jayden.
courtesy avn.com
visit RobRottenxxx.com
Up a dusty driveway with signs warning those who venture there to "Watch for Rattlesnakes!" the reporter wonders if he's found the right location. After some uphill hiking, he sees a large trampoline set up in a side yard upon which a fleshy, naked gal is performing oral sex on some hapless stud.
Yep. This must be the place.
The house itself is a sprawling, ramshackle affair and Rotten greets visitors to his set with cold beers and hot pizza.
He gives an overview of the movie while shooting two scenes simultaneously. "It's a 15-scene all blowjob movie," explains Rotten. "It's hilarious. Everything's spontaneous and improvised. The only thing I have for this movie is an approved budget by Metro. That's how I roll with most of my movies."
But production manager Johnny Thrust is starting to show signs of cracking under the stress. Rotten will later relate how Thrust experienced some sort of breakdown much like that of the character Kurtz in Joseph Conrad's Heart of Darkness.
"Some of the girls are getting booked as we speak," explains Rotten, who manages to maintain his own sense of calm.
The only way to rattle Rob Rotten, I'm guessing, is to threaten him with an industrial-sized magnet.
"It's like a ball," Rotten says of his production. "Once it starts rolling, it doesn't stop. So far we've done 5 scenes out of 10 today, so we're half done and right on schedule...well, actually, we're about two hours ahead of schedule."
Of course, the extra time is going to shooting comical setups to the scenes themselves. Rotten explains, "We're having a lot of fun shooting the skits. That's my favorite part. Even though this is just a blowjob movie and even though most people would shoot all the blowjobs in one day, I'd rather take two days and make it real funny and put some time and care into it."
And while the various scenes are being shot, the owner of the location is advising several wide--eyed new starlets that if they like to travel, "China is the place to go. The American dollar is strong there."
One of the girls pipes up with all the confidence and wisdom of her 18 years on planet earth and volunteers, "I've been to China."
"Really?" asks the owner. "Where were you?"
"Japan," she says.
Meanwhile, Rotten's setting up for another blowjob exchange, this time involving himself with Kaylee Love Cox. All I know is that if you worked a circus chimp this hard, you'd be going to jail.
A few days later, Metro exec Christian Mann sends a missive regarding the shoot. It reads, "First, I want to apologize to anyone who may be offended by the title of Rob Rotten's new movie. I want to state unequivocally that absolutely no people were actually swallowed during the production of this movie. True, several million sperm-cells were indeed ingested as they passed through the gullets of several attractive and thirsty—or is it hungry?—ladies. The protein-craving lasses may have used their considerable fellatio skills to lure the little buggers out of the pulsing shafts of the would-be fathers, but it should be noted that absent contact with a fertile ovary, the swimmers cannot technically be considered people and as such, Rob cannot be charged with murder. In fact, Mr. Rotten should be applauded for his contribution to the cause of birth control in an over-populated world. I have no additional comment at this time."
Spoken like a true businessman, indeed.
Swallow My Children will star, among many: Sasha Grey, Daisy Tanks, Britney Stevens, Whitney Stevens, Fayth Deluca, August West, Chavon Taylor, Heather Gables, Marsha Lord, Allison Pierce, Brandi Lyons, Mercedez Santos, Leighiani Red, Roxy DeVille, Laurie Vargas and Jocelyn Jayden.
courtesy avn.com
visit RobRottenxxx.com
Monday, May 14, 2007
Real Notes Written By Parents!
NO PARENT LEFT BEHIND I promise you cannot read these and not laugh out loud. These are real notes written by parents in an ALABAMA school district.
Spellings have been left intact.
1. My son is under a doctor's care and should not take PE today. Please execute him.
2. Please exkuce lisa for being absent she was sick and i had her shot.
3. Dear school: please ecsc's john being absent on jan. 28, 29, 30, 31, 32 and also 33.
4. Please excuse gloria from jim today. She is administrating.
5. Please excuse roland from p.e. for a few days. Yesterday he fell out of a tree and misplaced his hip.
6. John has been absent because he had two teeth taken out of his face.
7. Carlos was absent yesterday because he was playing football. He was hurt in the growing part.
8. Megan could not come to school today because she has been bothered by very close veins.
9. Chris will not be in school cus he has an acre in his side.
10. Please excuse ray friday from school. He has very loose vowels.
11. Pleaseexcuse Lesli from being absent yesterday. Shehad diahre dyrea direathe the shits. ?
12. Please excuse tommy for being absent yesterday. He had diarrhea, and his boots leak.
13. Irving was absent yesterday because he missed his bust.
14. Please excuse jimmy for being. It was his father's fault.
15. I kept Billie home because she had to go Christmas shopping because i don't know what size she wear.
16. Please excuse jennifer for missing school yesterday. We forgot to get the sunday paper off the porch, and when we found it monday. We thought it was sunday.
17. Sally won't be in school a week from friday. We have to attend her funeral.
18. My daughter was absent yesterday because she was tired. She spent a weekend with the marines.
19. Please excuse Jason for being absent yesterday. He had a cold and could not breed well.
20. Please excuse mary for being absent yesterday. She was in bed with gramps.
21. Gloria was absent yesterday as she was having a gangover.
22. Please excuse brenda. She has been sick and under the doctor.
23. Maryann was absent december 11-16, because she had a fever, sorethroat, headache and upset stomach. Her sister was also sick, fever an sore throat, her brother had a low grade fever and ached all over. I wasn't the best either, sore throat and fever. There must be something going around, her father even got hot last night.
Now we know why parents are screaming for better education for our kids.
Some people are like Slinkies... not good for much of anything, but they still bring a smile to your face as you push them down a flight of stairs.
Spellings have been left intact.
1. My son is under a doctor's care and should not take PE today. Please execute him.
2. Please exkuce lisa for being absent she was sick and i had her shot.
3. Dear school: please ecsc's john being absent on jan. 28, 29, 30, 31, 32 and also 33.
4. Please excuse gloria from jim today. She is administrating.
5. Please excuse roland from p.e. for a few days. Yesterday he fell out of a tree and misplaced his hip.
6. John has been absent because he had two teeth taken out of his face.
7. Carlos was absent yesterday because he was playing football. He was hurt in the growing part.
8. Megan could not come to school today because she has been bothered by very close veins.
9. Chris will not be in school cus he has an acre in his side.
10. Please excuse ray friday from school. He has very loose vowels.
11. Pleaseexcuse Lesli from being absent yesterday. Shehad diahre dyrea direathe the shits. ?
12. Please excuse tommy for being absent yesterday. He had diarrhea, and his boots leak.
13. Irving was absent yesterday because he missed his bust.
14. Please excuse jimmy for being. It was his father's fault.
15. I kept Billie home because she had to go Christmas shopping because i don't know what size she wear.
16. Please excuse jennifer for missing school yesterday. We forgot to get the sunday paper off the porch, and when we found it monday. We thought it was sunday.
17. Sally won't be in school a week from friday. We have to attend her funeral.
18. My daughter was absent yesterday because she was tired. She spent a weekend with the marines.
19. Please excuse Jason for being absent yesterday. He had a cold and could not breed well.
20. Please excuse mary for being absent yesterday. She was in bed with gramps.
21. Gloria was absent yesterday as she was having a gangover.
22. Please excuse brenda. She has been sick and under the doctor.
23. Maryann was absent december 11-16, because she had a fever, sorethroat, headache and upset stomach. Her sister was also sick, fever an sore throat, her brother had a low grade fever and ached all over. I wasn't the best either, sore throat and fever. There must be something going around, her father even got hot last night.
Now we know why parents are screaming for better education for our kids.
Some people are like Slinkies... not good for much of anything, but they still bring a smile to your face as you push them down a flight of stairs.
Friday, May 04, 2007
Metro Interactive / Loaded Digital Presents Rob Rotten's Scurvy Girls 2
The world’s most outrageous porn director Rob Rotten has done it again with Scurvy Girls 2. Rated AAAA (AVN May 2007).
Scurvy Girls 2 is a very bizarre but humorous mixture of vignette scenes starring: cover-girl Annette Schwarz, Roxy De Ville, Logan James, Persia Decarlo, Donny Long, Johnny Thrust, Dick Tracy, Jay Ashley and Rob Rotten himself. Rob takes part in his creations both in front of and behind the camera.
Rob had this to say about Scurvy Girls 2 – “Arrgh… Scurvy Girls 2... Plenty more of the ol' in out in out with my malenky devotchkas. A real horror-show I tell ya my droogs. None of the lubbilubbing, viddy my merzky molodoy devotchkas sodding in this sinny just for the likes of you. Enjoy this zammechat sinny and all of my ptitsas licking yarbles... Viddy Well, Rob Rotten".
Adds Metro Sales VP Christian Mann: “Rob Rotten has expressed my sentiments so articulately
already! The only thing I can add is to remind distributors that every single one of Rob’s movies have received an AVN AAAA rating, and most important, they all sell like crazy. Mr. Rotten has a specialized fan-base that consistently seeks his titles out. To put it poetically: When the rest of the porn is long forgotten, people remember the films of Rob Rotten!”
Rotten’s other titles for Loaded Digital include: Fuck The System, Porn Of The Dead, Scurvy Girls 1, Sperm Sponges. Cumming soon to his collection is “Swallow My Children” currently in production.
Tuesday, April 24, 2007
Man Cuts His Penis Off in a Restaurant
from drudgereport.com
London- A man chopped off his penis with a knife in front of horrified diners at a busy restaurant.
Police were called to Zizzi, in The Strand, London, at 9pm on Sunday after reports of a man in possession of a knife.
Sales rep Stuart McMahon, who was eating at the restaurant with his girlfriend, told the SUN:
"This guy came running in then charged into the kitchen, got a massive knife and started waving it about.
"Everyone was screaming and running out as he jumped on a table, dropped his trousers and popped his penis out.
"Then he cut it off. I couldn't believe it."
A Scotland Yard spokeswoman said a man aged between 30-40 was the only person injured and that his injuries were self-inflicted.
She said he was taken to a south London hospital where his condition was today described as stable.
London- A man chopped off his penis with a knife in front of horrified diners at a busy restaurant.
Police were called to Zizzi, in The Strand, London, at 9pm on Sunday after reports of a man in possession of a knife.
Sales rep Stuart McMahon, who was eating at the restaurant with his girlfriend, told the SUN:
"This guy came running in then charged into the kitchen, got a massive knife and started waving it about.
"Everyone was screaming and running out as he jumped on a table, dropped his trousers and popped his penis out.
"Then he cut it off. I couldn't believe it."
A Scotland Yard spokeswoman said a man aged between 30-40 was the only person injured and that his injuries were self-inflicted.
She said he was taken to a south London hospital where his condition was today described as stable.
Thursday, April 19, 2007
Jenna Jameson - The Pregnancy and the Malignant Melanoma
From E! Online: Let's talk Jenna Jameson. The once curvy gal has been lookin' skeletal as hell lately, so when I saw her walk the carpet with new human sidekick of choice Tito Ortiz, I had to get the scoop on her dramatic weight loss.
"I went from 125 to 95 pretty quickly. I think my lightest was about 92 pounds," she said, saying it was due to stress over her messy divorce. "As a woman, you either eat a lot or you don't eat. It wasn't intentional. Now I'm trying to gain a little weight back. I'm feeling really healthy and I feel a lot more positive. My divorce is starting to come around a bit, and hopefully I'm able to walk away from it not angry—and be able to be friends."
The former porn princess also addressed those pesky plastic surgery rumors that she had some work done (that went awry) below the belt. "The whole vaginal reconstruction thing is just retarded. It's embarrassing that someone would hate me so much to say something like that," the busty-in-many-ways babe scoffed.
"It's not botched...it's beautiful!" Jenna added, regarding her apparently scalpel-free nooky area. Tito nodded, enthusiastically, at this declaration. Um, too much information, you two.
From Hollyscoop.com: Jenna Jameson often keeps mum about her private life but now she's opening up about the not-so-positive things that have occurred in her past.
She reveals to Us Weekly that back in 2004 she went to the dermatologist only to find out that she was pregnant and had a mole that was malignant melanoma.
She was obviously ecstatic about her pregnancy but unfortunately her joy turned to sadness as she miscarried the baby due to the stress of the cancer.
“If the pregnancy would have lasted, I wouldn’t have had the surgery,” she says. “So it was all in God’s plan.”
"I went from 125 to 95 pretty quickly. I think my lightest was about 92 pounds," she said, saying it was due to stress over her messy divorce. "As a woman, you either eat a lot or you don't eat. It wasn't intentional. Now I'm trying to gain a little weight back. I'm feeling really healthy and I feel a lot more positive. My divorce is starting to come around a bit, and hopefully I'm able to walk away from it not angry—and be able to be friends."
The former porn princess also addressed those pesky plastic surgery rumors that she had some work done (that went awry) below the belt. "The whole vaginal reconstruction thing is just retarded. It's embarrassing that someone would hate me so much to say something like that," the busty-in-many-ways babe scoffed.
"It's not botched...it's beautiful!" Jenna added, regarding her apparently scalpel-free nooky area. Tito nodded, enthusiastically, at this declaration. Um, too much information, you two.
From Hollyscoop.com: Jenna Jameson often keeps mum about her private life but now she's opening up about the not-so-positive things that have occurred in her past.
She reveals to Us Weekly that back in 2004 she went to the dermatologist only to find out that she was pregnant and had a mole that was malignant melanoma.
She was obviously ecstatic about her pregnancy but unfortunately her joy turned to sadness as she miscarried the baby due to the stress of the cancer.
“If the pregnancy would have lasted, I wouldn’t have had the surgery,” she says. “So it was all in God’s plan.”
Tuesday, April 17, 2007
"Entourage" Holed Up in Ron Jeremy's Pad
TMZ has learned that the television show "Entourage" is using uber porn star Ron Jeremy's Los Angeles apartment for production during their new season, and they're paying him $500 dollars a day for the curious privilege.
TMZ spoke to Jeremy who told us "They are using both of my balconies." He also described how the crew from the hit show cleaned over five years of bird droppings from his balconies! Yes, bird droppings. "They invited me to come and watch several tapings, and they even fed me," Jeremy added. It's always good to feed your porn stars.
The cast and crew has been there for a few weeks, and we're told that, er, shooting will continue for a couple more months at the porny digs. As TMZ earlier reported, residents of the complex are not as enchanted with the crew, but Ron claims it's great having them around. "They even babysit my pet tortoise, Cherry." Who knew that Ron still had Cherry?
Ron's neighbors aren't happy. The condos, located at the foot of celeb-hiker favorite Runyon Canyon, has become home to the boys of "Entourage," along with a large crew, lights and cameras.
At first, residents of the complex were told that shooting would go on for a week or so, and that their daily lives wouldn't be affected. But a TMZ source inside the complex reveals that the group has been anything but unnoticeable. Our source said that crew dudes can be found lounging in a top-floor gym, and that the pool area has become a smoking section for the show's grips and cameramen. "It has definitely made a huge impact having the crew roaming around," said the source.
For those who watch the show, the reason for the new location is that the new season finds "Johnny Drama" finally getting his own place. The residents at this condo just wish it wasn't in their building!
TMZ contacted HBO reps for a comment, but didn't hear back by press time.
TMZ spoke to Jeremy who told us "They are using both of my balconies." He also described how the crew from the hit show cleaned over five years of bird droppings from his balconies! Yes, bird droppings. "They invited me to come and watch several tapings, and they even fed me," Jeremy added. It's always good to feed your porn stars.
The cast and crew has been there for a few weeks, and we're told that, er, shooting will continue for a couple more months at the porny digs. As TMZ earlier reported, residents of the complex are not as enchanted with the crew, but Ron claims it's great having them around. "They even babysit my pet tortoise, Cherry." Who knew that Ron still had Cherry?
Ron's neighbors aren't happy. The condos, located at the foot of celeb-hiker favorite Runyon Canyon, has become home to the boys of "Entourage," along with a large crew, lights and cameras.
At first, residents of the complex were told that shooting would go on for a week or so, and that their daily lives wouldn't be affected. But a TMZ source inside the complex reveals that the group has been anything but unnoticeable. Our source said that crew dudes can be found lounging in a top-floor gym, and that the pool area has become a smoking section for the show's grips and cameramen. "It has definitely made a huge impact having the crew roaming around," said the source.
For those who watch the show, the reason for the new location is that the new season finds "Johnny Drama" finally getting his own place. The residents at this condo just wish it wasn't in their building!
TMZ contacted HBO reps for a comment, but didn't hear back by press time.
"Entourage" Holed Up in Ron Jeremy's Pad
TMZ has learned that the television show "Entourage" is using uber porn star Ron Jeremy's Los Angeles apartment for production during their new season, and they're paying him $500 dollars a day for the curious privilege.
TMZ spoke to Jeremy who told us "They are using both of my balconies." He also described how the crew from the hit show cleaned over five years of bird droppings from his balconies! Yes, bird droppings. "They invited me to come and watch several tapings, and they even fed me," Jeremy added. It's always good to feed your porn stars.
The cast and crew has been there for a few weeks, and we're told that, er, shooting will continue for a couple more months at the porny digs. As TMZ earlier reported, residents of the complex are not as enchanted with the crew, but Ron claims it's great having them around. "They even babysit my pet tortoise, Cherry." Who knew that Ron still had Cherry?
TMZ spoke to Jeremy who told us "They are using both of my balconies." He also described how the crew from the hit show cleaned over five years of bird droppings from his balconies! Yes, bird droppings. "They invited me to come and watch several tapings, and they even fed me," Jeremy added. It's always good to feed your porn stars.
The cast and crew has been there for a few weeks, and we're told that, er, shooting will continue for a couple more months at the porny digs. As TMZ earlier reported, residents of the complex are not as enchanted with the crew, but Ron claims it's great having them around. "They even babysit my pet tortoise, Cherry." Who knew that Ron still had Cherry?
Tiffany Million Starring In New WE Cable Show - "Wife, Mom, Bountyhunter"
Here's Her Bio From The Website's Link -
"Sandra Scott was born in 1966, in Richmond, California. The only daughter of a steamfitter and stay-at-home mom, Sandra was never content to follow the ‘beaten path.' Sandra's mother Dianna nick-named her daughter "little miss twenty questions," and it became apparent from very early on that Sandra was destined to carve out her own niche in the world, as she never seemed content to accept things as they were.
Sandra comes from a long line of law enforcement officers and military. Sandra's great-grandpa Charles was a Denver cop. Her grandfather and stepfather were both cops who retired from the San Pablo, California Police Department. Sandra's father was a Marine and her brother was a cryptologist for the US Navy. Her sister in law (also her husband Ron's twin sister) served in "Operation Iraqi Freedom."
This innate sense of independence would forge a personality that would later become the foundation for Sandra Scott: Wife, Mom, and Bounty Hunter.
Sandra broke into the male-dominated profession of "bounty-hunting" in 2004. After several decades as an actress, author, radio personality and lady wrestler on the hit television show "G.L.O.W.: The Gorgeous Ladies of Wrestling", Sandra felt that she had finally found her true calling: tracking and arresting fugitives.
Her all-American blonde-hair and blue eyes, combined with a curvy body and outgoing personality, would both help and hinder her as a Bounty Hunter. Men in the industry shunned her, and attempted to prevent her from working in "THEIR" industry. Sandra got her first break as a bounty hunter working at an agency known as "World Executive Protection Group" owned and run by famous bounty hunter Zeke Unger (technical consultant for the Kiera Knightley movie Domino).
In 2005, Sandra was personally invited to attend the Hollywood premier of Domino by the producer. It was at this premier at Grumman's Chinese Theater that she met fellow bounty hunter J.D. Wall. His 6' 6", 350 lb. Frame and intimidating presence were enough for Sandra to invite J.D. to join her team.
Nowadays, Sandra lives in Pinal County, Arizona, and regularly hunts down and arrests the most wily and dangerous criminals in this hardscrabble part of the country.
Sandra has also recently become a bail bonds agent, and purchased an existing bail bonds company in historic Florence, Arizona, called "Old West Bail Bonds." Florence is famous for a high-profile prison break that occurred there in the 1970's, about which a book and a movie were made.
Sandra resides in Queen Creek, Arizona, with her husband Ron, 15-year-old daughter Sabree, three cats ("Mocha," "Daisy," and "Poppy"), and their Chihuahua, "Bonita." Sandra's 6 year old daughter Ever-Skye divides her time between her dad's home in Simi Valley, California, and Sandra's home in Arizona."
"Sandra Scott was born in 1966, in Richmond, California. The only daughter of a steamfitter and stay-at-home mom, Sandra was never content to follow the ‘beaten path.' Sandra's mother Dianna nick-named her daughter "little miss twenty questions," and it became apparent from very early on that Sandra was destined to carve out her own niche in the world, as she never seemed content to accept things as they were.
Sandra comes from a long line of law enforcement officers and military. Sandra's great-grandpa Charles was a Denver cop. Her grandfather and stepfather were both cops who retired from the San Pablo, California Police Department. Sandra's father was a Marine and her brother was a cryptologist for the US Navy. Her sister in law (also her husband Ron's twin sister) served in "Operation Iraqi Freedom."
This innate sense of independence would forge a personality that would later become the foundation for Sandra Scott: Wife, Mom, and Bounty Hunter.
Sandra broke into the male-dominated profession of "bounty-hunting" in 2004. After several decades as an actress, author, radio personality and lady wrestler on the hit television show "G.L.O.W.: The Gorgeous Ladies of Wrestling", Sandra felt that she had finally found her true calling: tracking and arresting fugitives.
Her all-American blonde-hair and blue eyes, combined with a curvy body and outgoing personality, would both help and hinder her as a Bounty Hunter. Men in the industry shunned her, and attempted to prevent her from working in "THEIR" industry. Sandra got her first break as a bounty hunter working at an agency known as "World Executive Protection Group" owned and run by famous bounty hunter Zeke Unger (technical consultant for the Kiera Knightley movie Domino).
In 2005, Sandra was personally invited to attend the Hollywood premier of Domino by the producer. It was at this premier at Grumman's Chinese Theater that she met fellow bounty hunter J.D. Wall. His 6' 6", 350 lb. Frame and intimidating presence were enough for Sandra to invite J.D. to join her team.
Nowadays, Sandra lives in Pinal County, Arizona, and regularly hunts down and arrests the most wily and dangerous criminals in this hardscrabble part of the country.
Sandra has also recently become a bail bonds agent, and purchased an existing bail bonds company in historic Florence, Arizona, called "Old West Bail Bonds." Florence is famous for a high-profile prison break that occurred there in the 1970's, about which a book and a movie were made.
Sandra resides in Queen Creek, Arizona, with her husband Ron, 15-year-old daughter Sabree, three cats ("Mocha," "Daisy," and "Poppy"), and their Chihuahua, "Bonita." Sandra's 6 year old daughter Ever-Skye divides her time between her dad's home in Simi Valley, California, and Sandra's home in Arizona."
Monday, April 16, 2007
American Idol Sex Tape
From NBC News:
Olivia Mojica, who just missed becoming a finalist during the second season of American Idol, will now be featured as the first contestant on the show to make a sex tape.
A Texas native, Mojica is the latest celebrity to see a video she recently made with her boyfriend find its way into the public arena and get broad distribution from Vivid Entertainment, the world’s leading adult film company.
The DVD is titled ‘Hardcore Idol’ and will be in stores across the country on May 3.
Mojica was ranked as one of the “best of the rest” in the second season of the wildly popular Fox TV show American Idol, when she was just 18.
She performed last on March 3, 2003, singing “Because You Loved Me” made popular by Celine Dion, but lost out to a field that included Ruben Studdard, Corey Clark and Clay Aiken.
She is currently singing at clubs and other venues across the country as well as working on a full length album which is expected to be in stores nationwide in 2008.
The video, which Mojica made with her boyfriend Adam Roberts a month ago in her New York City apartment, was obtained by Vivid, which is currently trying to contact Mojica to see if she will help promote the video and share in revenue from its sale.
Olivia Mojica, who just missed becoming a finalist during the second season of American Idol, will now be featured as the first contestant on the show to make a sex tape.
A Texas native, Mojica is the latest celebrity to see a video she recently made with her boyfriend find its way into the public arena and get broad distribution from Vivid Entertainment, the world’s leading adult film company.
The DVD is titled ‘Hardcore Idol’ and will be in stores across the country on May 3.
Mojica was ranked as one of the “best of the rest” in the second season of the wildly popular Fox TV show American Idol, when she was just 18.
She performed last on March 3, 2003, singing “Because You Loved Me” made popular by Celine Dion, but lost out to a field that included Ruben Studdard, Corey Clark and Clay Aiken.
She is currently singing at clubs and other venues across the country as well as working on a full length album which is expected to be in stores nationwide in 2008.
The video, which Mojica made with her boyfriend Adam Roberts a month ago in her New York City apartment, was obtained by Vivid, which is currently trying to contact Mojica to see if she will help promote the video and share in revenue from its sale.
Thursday, April 05, 2007
Michael Jackson Swears To Stop Any Memorabilia Auction That Doesn't Directly Bankroll His Next Insane Theme Park Project
Having been forced to abandon his grand plans for "LeprechaunWorld" and "Wet N' Wild: Bahrain" because of a tragic lack of imagination on the part of his host nations, Michael Jackson is seeking to set up shop in the only place where no vision is deemed too ambitious to be realized -- Las Vegas. Jackson is reportedly mulling both a Vegas show and the only kind of monument that can adequately celebrate his current levels of crazy -- a 50-foot robot. With lasers!
"It would be in the desert sands," said Mike Luckman of Luckman Van Pier, consultants to large entertainment companies. "Laser beams would shoot out of it so it would be the first thing people flying into Vegas would see. Neon is wonderful, but it's old school." Luckman's partner, Andre Van Pier, who designed the futuristic spacesuits worn recently by Bono and U2 at a benefit concert in New Orleans, designed the robot. He has also sketched out a stage set of a giant audience-interactive video game with human cyborgs controlled by the audience. Said Luckman: "Michael's looked at the sketches and likes them."
Now Michael Jackson has found himself distracted with the possibility of yet more legal entanglements, he is mulling whether to take action against the owners of a warehouse full of repossessed Jackson family memorabilia who plan on putting up the contents for auction. More than 1,100 Jackson family items are set for auction in Las Vegas next month, but a representative for Michael Jackson says the pop star is considering legal action to stop the sale. Guernsey's auction house said items include Michael Jackson's gold record for his Thriller album, handwritten lyrics for The Jackson Five hit ABC and a "Victory Tour" program signed by Jackson family members. The former owner, Henry Vaccaro, claimed a warehouse full of Jackson memorabilia after a failed business venture wound up in bankruptcy court. Michael Jackson and his sister Janet Jackson sued to stop Vaccaro from taking ownership, but a Los Angeles judge threw out Michael Jackson's claim in 2006.
The auction comes at precisely the moment Jackson could use an extra couple hundred million to bankroll his monolithic desert cyborg's titanium siding, but, sadly, should it proceed, the deposed pop monarch won't see a penny of the proceeds -- not even the lot featuring a mummified Bubbles in custom-tailored tuxedo, which, expert appraisers predict, could bring in somewhere in the low seven figures, to say nothing of his "Congratulations On Your 75th Nosejob" Certificate, a rare and valuable memento signed and certified by the Plastic Surgeons' Board of America.
from defamer.com
"It would be in the desert sands," said Mike Luckman of Luckman Van Pier, consultants to large entertainment companies. "Laser beams would shoot out of it so it would be the first thing people flying into Vegas would see. Neon is wonderful, but it's old school." Luckman's partner, Andre Van Pier, who designed the futuristic spacesuits worn recently by Bono and U2 at a benefit concert in New Orleans, designed the robot. He has also sketched out a stage set of a giant audience-interactive video game with human cyborgs controlled by the audience. Said Luckman: "Michael's looked at the sketches and likes them."
Now Michael Jackson has found himself distracted with the possibility of yet more legal entanglements, he is mulling whether to take action against the owners of a warehouse full of repossessed Jackson family memorabilia who plan on putting up the contents for auction. More than 1,100 Jackson family items are set for auction in Las Vegas next month, but a representative for Michael Jackson says the pop star is considering legal action to stop the sale. Guernsey's auction house said items include Michael Jackson's gold record for his Thriller album, handwritten lyrics for The Jackson Five hit ABC and a "Victory Tour" program signed by Jackson family members. The former owner, Henry Vaccaro, claimed a warehouse full of Jackson memorabilia after a failed business venture wound up in bankruptcy court. Michael Jackson and his sister Janet Jackson sued to stop Vaccaro from taking ownership, but a Los Angeles judge threw out Michael Jackson's claim in 2006.
The auction comes at precisely the moment Jackson could use an extra couple hundred million to bankroll his monolithic desert cyborg's titanium siding, but, sadly, should it proceed, the deposed pop monarch won't see a penny of the proceeds -- not even the lot featuring a mummified Bubbles in custom-tailored tuxedo, which, expert appraisers predict, could bring in somewhere in the low seven figures, to say nothing of his "Congratulations On Your 75th Nosejob" Certificate, a rare and valuable memento signed and certified by the Plastic Surgeons' Board of America.
from defamer.com
Wednesday, March 28, 2007
Nicole Sheridan On The Howard Stern Show
Howard had the porn star Nicole Sheridan into the studio to play a round of Win Fred’s Money. As a bonus, Howard added that Nicole had agreed to give KB, the virgin who was turned down for sex earlier this month when he won “a date” with another porn star, “a hand” if she lost to Fred. Before he got to the game, though, Howard told Nicole that he felt she could’ve been a legitimate model or married “a rich dude,” but she responded she was “too old” to model and wasn’t interested in being with a man just for his money. Nicole noted that she felt she chose “the perfect career” and had gone from starring in adult films to now mostly directing them. Nicole then revealed she was married, but that she’d still be able to go on “a date” with KB if she lost the game, adding that while she and her husband were “emotionally monogamous,” the same rules didn’t apply to their physical lives.
Nicole also admitted she didn’t completely shave her private area, preferring instead to keep it “neatly trimmed,” before discussing her first lesbian experience, which she recalled happened with two sisters while they were all in college. KB then came into the studio and told his story, and Nicole instructed him that women would be more interested in him if he acted more confident.
Nicole reported she had an IQ of 155 and was in “the gifted classes” in school, which was why she felt she could challenge Fred in the game. As Nicole showed off her body much to KB’s [audible] delight, Artie pointed out her IQ was the same as KB’s weight...“when he was in kindergarten.”
Following some phone calls for Nicole, Howard had Fred move into Robin’s booth so he couldn’t hear what was happening in the studio. These were the questions Howard asked Nicole and, later on, when it was Fred’s turn, as well as their responses:
• Who was the composer of “The Marriage of Figaro”? Nicole correctly answered Mozart, as did Fred.
• What musical instrument is held with the teeth and plucked with the finger? Nicole guessed the piccolo while Fred guessed the jaw’s harp, which was right, even though Howard said he also would’ve accepted the Jew’s harp.
• Which NFL team did John Madden coach to a Super Bowl victory? While Nicole incorrectly went with the New England Patriots, Fred was right with his response of the Oakland Raiders.
• Who was the last Major League Baseball pitcher to win 30 games? Neither Nicole nor Fred had a guess, and the answer was Denny McLain.
• Who wrote the plays “Our Town” and “The Matchmaker”? Nicole didn’t have a guess, but Fred was right when he answered Thornton Wilder.
• If you have triskaidekaphobia, what are you afraid of? Nicole was wrong when she said hair and Fred was right when he replied, “The number 13.”
• What is the second largest planet in the solar system? Nicole incorrectly guessed Venus and Fred incorrectly guessed Jupiter when the right answer was actually Saturn.
After promising to fulfill her promise and go on her “date” with KB, Nicole got on the Sybian, which very quickly brought her to orgasm. Nicole then announced her husband, Voodoo, wanted to come in to give Howard an engagement present – which was a necklace – and he begrudgingly let him in. As soon as he entered, Voodoo acknowledged he was having “a great week,” not just because he was on the Howard Stern Show this morning, but also because he was about to have sex with two women for a magazine photo shoot while his wife directed them how to orally pleasure him. Voodoo went on to note he wanted to have sex with Robin while also insisting he’d have no problems with Nicole being with Howard and Beth at the same time. Voodoo next promised KB that he was in for “the day of his life” given Nicole’s ability to use her hand on men, which she then demonstrated on a banana.
courtesy HowardStern.com
Did You Even Bother?
To see the hugely hyped Aniston - Cox kiss last night? 88% of voters (total votes 8.247) on TMZ.com said the kiss was totally lame.
Here it is if you need to see for yourself...
Here it is if you need to see for yourself...
Tuesday, March 27, 2007
XRCO Selects Jana Jordan as Heart-On Girl
The X-Rated Critics Organization (XRCO) has chosen Ninn Worx contract starlet Jana Jordan as the officia
l Heart-On Girl for its 23rd annual awards show, scheduled for April 5 in Hollywood.
l Heart-On Girl for its 23rd annual awards show, scheduled for April 5 in Hollywood.The Heart-On Girl presents the heart-shaped trophies to the winners, according to XRCO co-chairman Dirty Bob. She has traditionally been chosen from the ranks of the newest starlets with the strongest potential to be X-rated stars.
Jordan is so new there are still no movies with her on the street. Yet she's appeared on the covers of such publications as Hustler, Rockstar, Barely Legal, Live Young Girls and Spin, and was recently named Penthouse Pet of the Month.
The industry-only XRCO event will be the first chance for many in the adult business to get a gander at the blonde Texas native in the flesh.
"Trophy girls are sexy," Jordan said through her publicist. "I'm so happy to be the Heart-On Girl for the XRCO. I have to thank them for this honor."
The term Heart-On comes from the XRCO's heart-shaped trophy, which derives from the fact that for its first six years the awards show was held on Valentine's Day.
According to Jared Rutter, the original XRCO chairman, now a senior editor with AVN, the very first Heart-On Girl was Amber Lynn, in 1985. She was followed the next year by Nina Hartley. Both went on to become adult movie legends.
Other Heart-On Girls over the years have included such superstars-to-be as Kylie Ireland, Jewel De'Nyle and Tera Patrick, each of whom came back to host the ceremony in later years. Patrick returns again this year as co-host with hubby Evan Seinfeld.Starving For Sanjaya - Day 10!!!
Day 10
 | |
well in commemoration of my 10th day hunger striking, i decided to step on a scale today just out of curiosity.
i was shocked at what i saw, i've lost nearly 10lbs.
though i guess i really shouldn't be that shocked, considering both how i feel and the fact that several of my clothes are fitting looser.
thank goodness that tomorrow is Tuesday and there is yet another chance to vote Sanjaya off the show. i know we can do it this week guys! today was not much better for me than yesterday ...
peace out.
-j
Here's The Pic Of The ScaleStarving For Sanjaya
Here's her post -
About me:
Hi, my name is J. I have always been a big fan of American Idol, so like many people I was excited for the 6th season to start this year.
Aside from the initial debacle with contestant Antonella Barba, season 6 was starting to look like it may be actually very good. The big voices of Melinda Doolittle and LaKisha Jones, the innovative styling of Blake Lewis, and the smooth R&B of Phil Stacey are just a few of the hopefuls with immense potential.
However, there is one hinge in this broad spectrum of talent this year ... Sanjaya Malakar.
We have no problems with Sanjaya personally, he seems like a very personable and charming young man. However, he does NOT belong on American Idol. The judges faltered with their decision to place him in the 24, and American Idol voters have done even worse by keeping him on.
So until the day that Sanjya is no longer American Idol, I will be going on a hunger strike. This means I will refuse to eat anything until American Idol voters wise up, and stop voting Sanjya through each week.
Hit Her Myspace
and
Read Her Bulletin Posts
About me:
Hi, my name is J. I have always been a big fan of American Idol, so like many people I was excited for the 6th season to start this year.
Aside from the initial debacle with contestant Antonella Barba, season 6 was starting to look like it may be actually very good. The big voices of Melinda Doolittle and LaKisha Jones, the innovative styling of Blake Lewis, and the smooth R&B of Phil Stacey are just a few of the hopefuls with immense potential.
However, there is one hinge in this broad spectrum of talent this year ... Sanjaya Malakar.
We have no problems with Sanjaya personally, he seems like a very personable and charming young man. However, he does NOT belong on American Idol. The judges faltered with their decision to place him in the 24, and American Idol voters have done even worse by keeping him on.
So until the day that Sanjya is no longer American Idol, I will be going on a hunger strike. This means I will refuse to eat anything until American Idol voters wise up, and stop voting Sanjya through each week.
Hit Her Myspace
and
Read Her Bulletin Posts
Friday, March 23, 2007
More Jenna Jameson Drama
Jenna Jameson posts on MySpace: Just like always... he [Jay Grdina] rears his ugly head, only when it might mean a little press for him. He wants to be a star so bad, and has ridden my coat tails for years. I wish him luck, he wants it more than anyone I know. He gave everything up for it... period.It's really too bad that he feels the need to bash me and not accept any blame for his hideous actions... but it will all come out in the end. The truth will set you free. Good luck...J
Darth writes on www.xxxporntalk.com: Jay created Jenna Jamison. Jenna didn't create Jenna Jamison. Jay did the whole club jenna and hired people to manage her myspace account. She seems as motivated as a can of tuna.
Moron Boy Responds: The way I see things, Wicked Pictures created Jenna Jameson. Jay saw an oppurtunity to make some $$$ after she split with them.
Calvin writes on XPT: But she [Jenna] is a role model for a lot of women. Look at all the new talent coming into the industry and treating it as a "career". Parcelling out the sex acts to drive up the price. Expecting to cash in, then cross over to semi-legitimate mainstream status.
There is nothing really new about this. Look at Ginger Lynn's career path. If she had come up in 1993, she would have done the same thing, and would still have failed to take that last step where she becomes accepted.
I suspect that this is also part of what is driving Jenna to her current state. The divorce, and potentially losing a large chunk of her empire must hurt, but she has also hit the glass ceiling of respectability. People buy her book and invite her to B-list red carpet events, but she is never going to get her own ABC sitcom or starring role in a "legitimate" movie - and she wouldn't get one even if she could act.
Lethal Butt Shot Kills Anna Nicole
WWW - [NY Daily News] - Anna Nicole Smith died of a lethal level of a potent sleep medication, but she had a raging blood infection that could have killed her had she not overdosed, an exclusive report revealed yesterday.Smith took the speedy sleep-inducer chloral hydrate, which is sometimes used in "date rape" drugs, the night of Feb. 7th and never woke up, according to a joint investigation by sister publications the National Enquirer and the Star.
In the most stunning disclosure, the report says Smith's life might have been saved had she simply gone to a hospital rather than treating her severe fever, nausea and other infection symptoms on her own.
Smith's lawyer pal Howard K. Stern, a bodyguard and a nurse were with her in the days and hours leading up to her death.
The report comes days before Broward County Medical Examiner Dr. Joshua Perper is set to reveal his official findings about what killed the 39-year-old ex-model, who died Feb. 8 at a Florida hotel.
Smith's infection, which drove her temperature to a staggering 105 degrees, was caused by an injection in her left buttock with a needle that apparently was not properly sterilized, according to the report, posted on the Enquirer and Star Web sites.
Tests did not reveal what substance had been injected into Smith three days before she died, but a painful abscess developed, the report said.
Wednesday, March 21, 2007
He Says, She Says -- Jenna Jameson Blames Drop In Weight On Divorce, Jay Says PREACH ON BITCH
Jenna Jameson and her soon-to-be former husband and business partner, Jay Grdina are becoming the new Travis Barker and Shana Moakler.
The high priestess of porn took to her MySpace blog yesterday, lashing out at her ex and blaming the nastiness he's causing her during their divorce proceedings on her recently extreme weight loss.
Jenna Jameson posts: I feel like I need to address the weight rumors that have been swirling for a few months now. This saddens me... only because, everyone that is judging me... has absolutely NO idea what is happening in my life. People are hateful and accuse me of being a drug addict, or an anorexic.Does anyone seem to remember the fact that I am going through a nasty divorce? It has been weighing heavily on me. I worked extremely hard for years to secure my success, and i have been forced to fight for everything I busted my ass for. This has definitely affected my weight. It really hurts that my fans and everyone else has taken it upon themselves to be so horrible, screaming "eat a burger!" or "we want the old jenna back!" I'm sure everyone out there has gone through tough times, and this is when I need support.
I wish I could enlighten everyone with what is exactly going on in my divorce and business, but I can't because of legal proceedings. I really hope everyone understands and remembers I am human, and I really need friends and the love and support right now.
Soon the divorce will be settled and I am hoping to come out unscathed, but my x is doing his best to make it hard. Thanks for all of your support, and remember I love you! xoxoxox, Jenna
Then Jay posted this message on his MySpace blog.
PREACH ON BITCH
Blah Blah Blah... people in life are amazing! It's funny how individuals always believe their own bullshit.. or basically their side of the story... as flamboyantly as they might want to tell it. Peeps will convince themselves that the shit they spout out of their mouths is the truth and that it justifies everything in their lil realm of reality!! This is man's/woman's best justification of actions and feelings. I love to call it the "Denial Zone". There are always 3 sides to the story and only one side to the truth.. It's a funny theory, but it is a reality of life. People in general will always try to blame someone or some thing else for their own faults, inadequacies and/or weaknesses... this is a classic scenario and the best form of defiance! At some point in all of our lives we have to face...REALITY..and the majority of the times its is not fun, exciting, or something anyone wants to deal with. This is when the real people .. the ones with integrity and honesty step out from the pack. I recently read a blog from someone blaming their physical appearance on circumstances and situations.. all of which are completely self perpetuated, on a victim or stress and circumstance. At some point you just have to be honest with yourself... as much as it might hurt and say.. I need help, my life and what I am doing is wrong! At which poijnt you need to become proactive in the rectification of the situation. The saddest point about all of this is that most people have to hit rock bottom b4 they realize this simple truth.... this is heart breaking to everyone that loves and supports that person. I always ask myself ...why does it have to get this??? For the people that love and try to help..well...we have an inherent flaw that is in most of us.. we want to help... we always want to come to the rescue; and the person in need has no control; abuses and consumes.. consumes like a psychic vampire! Thse are just truths in life i like to pass on.. if they fit in your scenario of life, then appreciate them. I will never use this forum as a personal place to verbally slaughter people and/or personas.... This is a place where I can rant and express.... My theory to life is something that I believe to be helpful... that's it! Take it for what it's worth. I will do a blog later about what is happing in life...the last 4 weeks have been SIIIIIIKKKKK!!!!! That I will save for the next blog.
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