POLL: Will Biden Field Dress Palin's Moose Tonight?

I have been waiting all week for this! Yes! Yes! Yes! In the meantime, post your opinions by clicking on the "Click Here To Add Your Comment" link below and just post your responses to these questions:

1) Will Biden field dress Palin's moose tonight?

2) If this shit was on PPV, would you actually pay to watch this debate?

3) Have you already gotten your popcorn?

4) Are they gonna have their ears checked for little receivers first that might help with answers and such?

5) Do you think Palin is stupid?

6) Did McCain make a fatal error in selecting her?

7) Would you rather have a polar bear as VP than her?

8) How long will it take to get the juiciest clips up on YouTube?

Open Casting Call ... For ... Sarah Palin Lookalike

THIS IS A TRUE STORY! AS REPORTED IN THE NEW YORK POST...



Hustler Founder Larry Flynt and his Hustler Video have announced today plans to make a porn video spoofing Alaska Governor & Republican Vice Presidential Candidate Sarah Palin. Since Tina Fey is busy doing the spoof for Saturday Night Live, an ad has been placed on Craigslist seeking a Palin double who will not say "Thanks But No Thanks" to the $3,000 that is being offered for the role. Examples of possible titles - "Juneau You Want It" and "Northern Xxxposure."

Big News - FREE Live Feeds Coming Soon For VideoTeam Members

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Pamela Anderson Makes Ellen's Day!

Click Here - Would you hit this? I know Ellen would!

Pamela Anderson gave Ellen a late Bachelorette Party gift on the Sept. 10 edition of her show when Pam stripped down to her bikini and danced around. Every once in a while some paparazzi pics of Pam looking rough show up, but the 41-year-old Canadian proved she still has a rockin’ body. Ellen’s face says it all! You know you'd bang her!

The World Has Now Collectively And Officially Gone Insane

Black Is White.
Up Is Down.
In Is Out.



Yes Is No.
Wrong Is Right.
Hot Is Cold.

BREAKING NEWS: McCain Found Drinkin Pune juice And Pinching Old Ladies' Asses At The Bingo Hall!

OMG! I Can't Wait Till Thursday!!!

I am so looking forward to that debate!!! It's going to be a train wreck!!!

McCain Declares Victory Over Debate That Hasn't Happened Yet!!!

This guy is in the process of losing his marbles right before our very eyes! I am having so much fun watching this, every day is a new drama!

After suspending his campaign in order to focus all his energy on the economic crisis and then sitting like a bookend for 43 minutes in the meeting yesterday with Bush and Obama without saying a word, McCain released a campaign web ad this morning in the online version of the Wall Street Journal declaring "McCain Wins Debate!" -- put out even before the candidate had announced he was planning to debate.

"McCain Wins Debate!" declares the ad which features a headshot of a smiling McCain with an American flag background. Another ad spotted by our eagle-eyed observer featured a quote from McCain campaign manager Rick Davis declaring: "McCain won the debate-- hands down."


Here's the screenshot.

Seriously, we need to note that this guy is off his rocker, and just in case we lose him, his choice for VP is pretty scary.

I'd Say It's A Tie...

Man Charged With Battery For Farting At Cops

A West Virginia man accused of passing gas and fanning it toward a police officer no longer faces a battery charge.

The Kanawha County prosecutor's office requested that the charge be dropped against 34-year-old Jose Cruz.

Cruz, of Clarksburg, W. Va., was pulled over early Tuesday for driving without headlights, police said. According to the criminal complaint, Cruz smelled of alcohol, had slurred speech and failed three field sobriety tests before he was handcuffed and taken to a police station.

According to a criminal complaint, Cruz passed gas and made a fanning motion toward patrolman T.E. Parsons after being taken for a breathalyzer test.

"The gas was very odorous and created contact of an insulting or provoking nature with Patrolman Parsons," the complaint alleged.

Cruz acknowledged passing gas, but said he didn't move his chair toward the officer nor aim gas at the patrolman. He said he had an upset stomach at the time, but police denied his request to go to the bathroom when he first arrived at the station.

"I couldn't hold it no more," he said.

He also denied being drunk and uncooperative as the police complaint alleged. He added he was upset at being prepared for a breathalyzer test while having an asthma attack. The police statement said he later resisted being secured for a trip to a hospital that he requested for asthma treatment.

Cruz said the officers thought the gas incident was funny when it happened and laughed about it with him.

Cruz, who was arrested Tuesday, still faces two charges: driving under the influence and driving without headlights, and two counts of obstruction.

David Letterman ON FIRE!

This is 9 minutes but well worth it, David is at his very best!

Hef Loses His Whole Harem - Like Our $700 Billion, Snap Your Fingers And It's Gone

The economy is not the only thing taking a dive. Now Hugh Hefner's sex life is in the toilet too!


Earlier this week it was announced that Kendra was hooking up with Hank Baskett of the Philadelphia Eagles, and that Holly had ditched him for Chris Angel. Regarding Holly and Chris being spotted in Vegas over the weekend, Hef tells Usmagazine.com in a new interview, "She is still my girlfriend. Now will that last? I don’t think anything lasts forever. I love her very much, but you know, she wants very much to get married and have children. That isn’t very much in the cards for me," he adds. "So there has to be a certain reality there. And I’m sure the time will come when she’ll be dating others. That’s part of the transition."

As of yesterday we were left thinking only Bridget Marquardt, who is married to a man in Ohio, has stayed loyal to Hefner while developing a show for the Travel Channel but we find today that even this is not true.

From thesuperficial.com:
Hugh Hefner really must be rocking the Depends because Bridget Marquart, the last faithful Girl Next Door, is bailing on him, Page Six reports:

Word comes that Marquardt also has a man on the side. Our tipster says, "Bridget's been getting quite close with Nick Carpenter, Marisa Tomei's ex-boyfriend. He directed her in a movie recently and apparently they 'hang out' whenever she can escape the mansion."

Goddamn, this is depressing. I refuse to accept it's not possible for a man to have enough money that he can score with a gaggle of young blonde chicks with fake breasts well into his 80s. I'm pretty sure that's the guiding principle of our great nation. In fact, if history serves me correct, Benjamin Franklin said it best when he said "See how many ho's you can get with this printing press, Mr. Jefferson, and make sure they got them breasteses all huge and stuff."

Special Announcement From Barack Obama

WTF - Horrible News - Can Someone In Russia Confirm This?????

Just got this by email. Nothing in the local news, nothing on CNN, is this true????
Fucking shocking!!!!

Fail.

Slacker Uprising, Watch The Whole Movie Now - It's FREE!

Michael Moore's new movie is available for free as a gift from him to all of you. And you have his permission to download it, share it or show it in any way you see fit. Click the image...

Jenna Jameson Twins Update

Jenna Jameson writes-

Twins!!!!!!
Current mood: ecstatic

Yes everyone, I can officially confirm that Tito and I are expecting twins! I had my second ultrasound today and was greeted by two big healthy babies with pounding hearts. I can’t even express the extreme serenity that came over me once I saw my children inside me. It has been my dream to have children for an exremely long time, and I truly feel like finally… the time is right and god has blessed me. I have never felt more like a woman, or more alive.

Tito is happier than I have ever seen him, it is so fulfilling to see him so proud. He looked me in the eye today after our doctors appointment and said "I’m the luckiest man on earth… thank you for having my babies". I cried.

I have been spending my days on bedrest, not because it is doctor ordered… but because I am so incredibly fatigued and nauseous. It's hard to drag myself out of bed some mornings, which is hard for me… since I am always so active! I have officially gained 7 pounds so far, and am planning on a lot more. I crave fruit by the gallon… oranges and pineapple are at the top of my list. Cereal at 3 am suits me every night!

Lastly, I want to thank all of you for your unwavering support. It means so much to me, I don’t think you even know. There are a lot of nasty comments from insensitive people, but in my state of incredible happiness… It doesn't matter what they say!

I love all of you!

JJ

What Is White Privilege?

White privilege is when you can get pregnant at seventeen like
Bristol Palin and everyone is quick to insist that your life and that
of your family is a personal matter, and that no one has a right to
judge you or your parents, because "every family has challenges,"
even as black and Latino families with similar "challenges" are
regularly typified as irresponsible, pathological and arbiters of social decay.

White privilege is when you can call yourself a "fuckin' redneck,"
like Bristol Palin's boyfriend does, and talk about how if anyone
messes with you, you'll "kick their fuckin' ass," and talk about how
you like to "shoot shit" for fun, and still be viewed as a
responsible, all-American boy (and a great son-in-law to be) rather
than a thug.

White privilege is when you can attend four different colleges in six
years like Sarah Palin did (one of which you basically failed out of,
then returned to after making up some coursework at a community
college), and no one questions your intelligence or commitment to
achievement, whereas a person of color who did this would be viewed
as unfit for college, and probably someone who only got in the first
place because of affirmative action.

White privilege is when you can claim that being mayor of a town
smaller than most medium-sized colleges, and then Governor of a state
with about the same number of people as the lower fifth of the island
of Manhattan, makes you ready to potentially be president, and people
don't all piss on themselves with laughter, while being a black U.S.
Senator, two-term state Senator, and constitutional law scholar,
means you're "untested."

White privilege is being able to say that you support the words
"under God" in the pledge of allegiance because "if it was good
enough for the founding fathers, it's good enough for me," and not be
immediately disqualified from holding office--since, after all, the
pledge was written in the late 1800s and the "under God" part wasn't
added until the 1950s--while believing that reading accused criminals
and terrorists their rights (because, ya know, the Constitution,
which you used to teach at a prestigious law school requires it), is
a dangerous and silly idea only supported by mushy liberals.

White privilege is being able to be a gun enthusiast and not make
people immediately scared of you.

White privilege is being able to have a husband who was a member of
an extremist political party that wants your state to secede from the
Union, and whose motto was "Alaska first," and no one questions your
patriotism or that of your family, while if you're black and your
spouse merely fails to come to a 9/11 memorial so she can be home
with her kids on the first day of school, people immediately think
she's being disrespectful.

White privilege is being able to make fun of community organizers and
the work they do--like, among other things, fight for the right of
women to vote, or for civil rights, or the 8-hour workday, or an end
to child labor--and people think you're being pithy and tough, but if
you merely question the experience of a small town mayor and 18-month
governor with no foreign policy expertise beyond a class she took in
college--you're somehow being mean, or even sexist.

White privilege is being able to convince white women who don't even
agree with you on any substantive issue to vote for you and your
running mate anyway, because all of a sudden your presence on the
ticket has inspired confidence in these same white women, and made
them give your party a "second look."

White privilege is being able to fire people who didn't support your
political campaigns and not be accused of abusing your power or being
a typical politician who engages in favoritism, while being black and
merely knowing some folks from the old-line political machines in
Chicago means you must be corrupt.

White privilege is being able to attend churches over the years whose
pastors say that people who voted for John Kerry or merely criticize
George W. Bush are going to hell, and that the U.S. is an explicitly
Christian nation and the job of Christians is to bring Christian
theological principles into government, and who bring in speakers who
say the conflict in the Middle East is God's punishment on Jews for
rejecting Jesus, and everyone can still think you're just a good
churchgoing Christian, but if you're black and friends with a black
pastor who has noted (as have Colin Powell and the U.S. Department of
Defense) that terrorist attacks are often the result of U.S. foreign
policy and who talks about the history of racism and its effect on
black people, you're an extremist who probably hates America.

White privilege is not knowing what the Bush Doctrine is when asked
by a reporter, and then people get angry at the reporter for asking
you such a "trick question," while being black and merely refusing to
give one-word answers to the queries of Bill O'Reilly means you're
dodging the question, or trying to seem overly intellectual and nuanced.

White privilege is being able to claim your experience as a POW has
anything at all to do with your fitness for president, while being
black and experiencing racism is, as Sarah Palin has referred to it a
"light" burden.

And finally, white privilege is the only thing that could possibly
allow someone to become president when he has voted with George W.
Bush 90 percent of the time, even as unemployment is skyrocketing,
people are losing their homes, inflation is rising, and the U.S. is
increasingly isolated from world opinion, just because white voters
aren't sure about that whole "change" thing. Ya know, it's just too
vague and ill-defined, unlike, say, four more years of the same,
which is very concrete and certain.

White privilege is, in short, the problem.

Did Kendra's Playboy Split Have Anything To Do With This???!!!

From the AdultFYI Football Pool Files: Eagles' Hank Baskett Banging Playboy Chick Kendra Wilkinson?



[Philadelphia Daily News] Eagles receiver Hank Baskett seems to be quite chummy with Kendra Wilkinson, a Playboy model and one of the co-stars on E!'s "The Girls Next Door."

Wilkinson is, on the show at least, one of Hugh Hefner's live-in girlfriends. We're told that Wilkinson, 23, and Baskett, 26, recently dined together at Redstone (500 Rt. 73 S.) in Marlton.

She lists "HB3" as one of her heroes on her MySpace page, and Baskett's page, which is private, says "HB3 in LOOOOOVVVVEEEE!!!!" An Eagles spokesman contacted Baskett for comment and got back to us saying he had not heard from the receiver.

Good Luck, Kendra! He's HOT!

How Many Cars Do You Have?

Personally, I just need one. But if your wife spent $750,000 in just one month on clothing and accessories (I am not joking about this -- AND all the while insisting that her family was not "elitist" but that the other candidate was) you might need a few extra trunks to haul all that swag back to the house too. Does this guy think he is Jay Leno?



From msnbc.com
When you have seven homes, that's a lot of garages to fill. After the fuss over the number of residences owned by the two presidential nominees, NEWSWEEK looked into the candidates' cars. And based on public vehicle-registration records, here's the score. John and Cindy McCain: 13. Barack and Michelle Obama: one.

One vehicle in the McCain fleet has caused a small flap. United Auto Workers president Ron Gettelfinger, an Obama backer, accused McCain this month of "flip-flopping" on who bought daughter Meghan's foreign-made Toyota Prius. McCain said last year that he bought it, but then told a Detroit TV station on Sept. 7 that Meghan "bought it, I believe, herself." (The McCain campaign did not respond to multiple requests for comment.)

Obama's lone vehicle also is a green machine, a 2008 Ford Escape hybrid. He bought it last year to replace the family's Chrysler 300C, a Hemi-powered sedan. Obama ditched the 300C, once 50 Cent's preferred ride, after taking heat for driving a guzzler while haranguing Detroit about building more fuel-efficient cars.

McCain's personal ride, a 2004 Cadillac CTS, is no gas sipper, but it should make Detroit happy because it's made by General Motors. "I've bought American literally all my life and I'm proud," McCain said in the interview with Detroit's WXYZ-TV. But the rest of his fleet is not all-American. There's a 2005 Volkswagen convertible in the garage along with a 2001 Honda sedan. Otherwise, there's a 2007 half-ton Ford pickup truck, which might come in handy on the Sedona ranch; a vintage 1960 Willys Jeep; a 2008 Jeep Wrangler; a 2000 Lincoln; and a 2001 GMC SUV. The McCains also own three 2000 NEV Gem electric vehicles, which are bubble-shaped cars popular in retirement communities.

Only the Cadillac is registered in the candidate's name. Cindy McCain's name is on 11 vehicles, though not the one she actually drives. That car, a Lexus, is registered to her family's beer-distributor business and is outfitted with personalized plates that read MS BUD.